Xion's Blog of Science and Mathematics
by Mademoiselle Anime Amour
Summary: Still without any educational merit! Xion presents an updated version of the old blog, and it's an online free-for-all. Old grievances addressed, a grocery store trip gone awry, and Luxord attempting to become a writer. Blog Kingdom (working title) exposes it all!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Whew, haven't made one of these in a while, I'm getting kinda nostalgic! As the (semi)-great Tony Stark once proclaimed in Iron Man 2, "it is goooood to be back!" And it kind of is. Did you guys honestly think I'd pass up the chance to publish a follow-up fic to a fave (and an easy-to-write, heh) KH story of mine to celebrate KH3 FINALLY almost coming out?! Granted, I'm cheap and will prob. just watch the cutscenes as opposed to dropping a lot of coin on a new PS4 and a new game...But, this is still a momentous freaking occasion as a nerd who was waiting for this to come out since she was...well, quite a bit younger than now, heh. So, yes, Xion's Blog and subsequent crazy posts are back. I genuinely, sincerely hope you enjoy, and I'm so excited for KH3.**

 **It's redundant to say I don't own anything, so let's leave it at that, yes? :)**

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

 **Subject: Say Hello to the New and Improved Blog Site!**

I dub it…Blog Kingdom! Or something. Look, guys, you got to cut me some slack, I was busy spending all my energy on making this NOT look like a site from the Dark Ages like it was last time. Your girl, still rankless and numberless, tried her best, so I'll just leave it at that for now. We can all collectively decide on a name later.

So, a lot has happened since the last site was eaten away by spam and yaoi fan art bots that just replicated and replicated—and, yeah, no one needs reminding, huh? Through Vexen's ingenious time machine (and extensive retconning), Sora, Riku, Kairi, and I took the liberty of preventing the St. Valentine's Day Yaoi Fangirl Massacre from ever taking place. You're welcome. That was a freaking mess! We at Castle Org. got a brand-new sound system, complete with CDs, so there'll be no more stealing from other people. Which is great, isn't it, Axel? And we're still under contract yet continue on in our bubble until the writers decide some devastating tragedy will befall half the cast and then…But, eh, let's leave it to THAT world, shall we?

And, lastly, let's all play nice. I'm serious this time. Put. The. Weapons. Away!

 **Posted by: Xion**

 **Comments** :

 _Shouldn't you all call me Lea by now? ;)_

Axel

 _No! I'm still in denial about that. I met you as Axel, you're still Axel as far as I know. Besides, lea is for sheep to graze in, your parents should have done better, meh._

Xion

 _You…You undid our beautiful work! How dare you! Why would you risk the harpy menace rising again? Saix and I had that matter taken care of._

Marluxia

 _Annnd… you committed genocide in the process. I can't believe the sociopaths we have in this Org., I swear._

Xion

 _Xi, you're just now figuring that out?_

Roxas

 _Well, come on, Rox! We're not all that bad! Right?_

Xion

 _Depends on the day._

Xaldin

 _Just seeing your name's made me think of a good follow-up post…._

Xion

* * *

 **Subject: OK, A Few Guidelines**

All right, guys, I just got inspired. There were a lot of complaints from people last time about all the big and little ways our old happy blog got out-of-hand. I have to agree. So, I'm going to lay down a few ground rules.

1.) No blatant threats of violence on ANYONE. Poor Selphie is still recovering.

2.) Yes, Xemnas, flirting online is OK. However, what's not OK? Nonconsensual "flirting" that skeeves people out. Kinda saw hints of that on the last blog site, so if you must be a perv, do that in the privacy of your own mind. Not naming names, but you all know who you are.

3.) No gambling links, that gets people addicted. LUXORD!

4.) We had one blog post I quickly had to take down of Zexion laying out his "contract" in full, because he was salty about having limited screen time. First rule of show biz, do not talk about show biz, capiche? Or, at the very least, don't lay out your legal docs like that, that's how people get hacked.

K, think that's all I got. ^_^

 **Posted by: Xion**

 **Comments** :

 _Xion. The youth of today are corrupting our polite adult society with their hormones. So, no…_

Xemnas

 _Ugh, don't say it._

Xion

 _Yeah, Xemnas, Xion and I are still dating. It's cool._

Riku

 _No._

Xemnas

 _Kairi and I have been a couple before the very first blog post, dude, come on!_

Sora

 _No._

Xemnas

 _And it's not just the children—Larxene and I are still a pair, if you recall, Superior._

Marluxia

 _ **NOFLIRTINGONLINE**_.

Xemnas

 _Ugggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh._

Xion

* * *

 **A/N: OK, guys, simple start, but it will get zanier from there, I promise!. I got five full chapters and counting in the can so far. My update schedule may be a little more inconsistent than in the olden days, but with potentially dangerous winter weather coming (ah, Midwest, never change...), I may just update a couple more times before the weekend. Idk. I didn't even think I'd get this far back into the swing of things!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Guys, you are awesome! Chapter one's already attracted quite a few hits, and that one was really just to get the ball rolling (and, admittedly, yeah, bring back a couple old gags from the first Xion's Blog story). Here's tonight's, I'll prob. upload one more on Friday, and then I'll prob. hunker down and get even more productive with just writing/editing after that. Thanks for giving this sequel a shot!**

* * *

 **Chapter 2**

 **I'm More British Than U**

 **Xaldin**

Did I hear correctly, or is there going to be an upcoming casting call for James Bond soon? Perhaps if it's a blind audition, they hear a recording of my voice…I'm sure to get the part instantly! I've been told my voice is beautiful enough to provide narration for audiobooks.

Also, I discovered a great thing called Autocorrect. And an even greater thing called a dog filter on somewhere called Snapchat? I look so silly! Barf, barf.

 **Comments:**

 _Damn you, Autocorrect!_

Xaldin

 _And you wonder why we young folk are way more active on our blogs. We're actually good at Internetz._

Kairi

" _Barf, barf", I'm dead!_

Demyx

 _Now, now, both of you, the man is only trying his best. We have decades of catching up to do, unlike you spoiled lot with the power of the all-encompassing Internet at the tips of your fingers since birth. You are all such snowflakes!_

Vexen

… _There's a certain corner of the Internet you must never go to then, Vex._

Riku

 _The sun never touches it._

Namine

 _It's the shadowy place…Or, actually, I think it's an elephant graveyard but with broken conspiracy vid links and frog pictures. Don't know, might have to ask Simba about that some time._

Sora

 _Well, this took a bloody turn. __

Xaldin

 _Vex always steals the show, man! What more can you do?_

Xigbar

* * *

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

Good thing everyone's still in their relationships and all that. Mine had to end once someone (not saying who) pointed out I'm actually 21. So…yeah…Kind of awkward for a guy who, up to that point, still thought he was sixteen. But hey, I still listen to the same stuff I did at that age anyway, I still eat loads of junk food, and I'll play video games with Rox until 3 am. Only difference is, it used to be Saix I played video games with, way back when. Well, shoot, this is awkward. I guess what I'm saying is I still have a lot to unpack now that I'm…kind of in limbo among the rest of the Org. Nobodies. There are always memories to look back on, some on the painful side.

 **Comments:**

 _I was doing you a favor. Your relationship with Namine was questionable at best!_

Zexion

 _That was for me to decide, thanks. But, yeah, Zexion, you're probably right. I mean…we'd get weird looks from people, lol. People thought Axel, because of his height, was my dad._

Namine

 _Ewwwwwwwww, no._

Demyx

 _That's a whole other kettle of fish I'm not touching._

Kairi

 _They had a point… :/_

Namine

 _And so, that ship has sailed. Drifting along the waves, it sets its course for the shimmering, sparkling Xanadu from whence it came. Other ships will be sure to pass this familiar way time and again, as broken dreams and promises continue to accumulate. Like sands through the hour glass, so are the days of our lives._

Luxord

 _That was purple as hell, man._

Axel

 _It's OK, Luxord, Axel (Lea?) and I are still friends, lol! We just agreed our thing was kind of weird, that's all._

Namine

 _Young love is always worth mourning…Actually, no, I'm trying to draft a manuscript._

Luxord

 _Well, then, epic fail, dude! And we're really doing this "Lea" thing, aren't we Axe? *sigh*_

Xion

 _I mean, kind of? Look, I'll get back to you on that, I still got a lot of mental stuff to sift through. It's gonna make my head explode! Just waaay more thinking than I'm used to._

Axel

 _That explains so much._

Saix

* * *

 **A/N: Yes, I think in my wiser age, I'm starting to distance myself from the Axel/Namine pairing. I think I liked the idea of their personalities together more when I was younger...and didn't think about their age difference as much. Yeah, it's kinda weird when you think about it. But, oh well, it is what it is!**

 **And this marks Luxord's first stab at authorship!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Whoa, so I know this site has been good to me, like it's been good to/for so many other people on here...But, almost 200 hits to my stories yesterday, really?! Wow, you all rock. This has been quite the welcome back here, I must say. And thanks for the reviews so far!**

 **So, here's today's chapter, and then, I'll just be working on this fic more throughout the weekend so I can get enough ahead to possibly post two chapters a day, like I did with the original? Hm, we'll see! No promises, but that's my hope anyway.**

* * *

 **Chapter 3**

 **Just Some Guy with a Key**

 **Sora**

You know me, guys. Even you guys at the Org., as much of a pain as 97% of you are, know me (sort of). I'm a simple guy who tries to stay upbeat. But, I'm going to be upfront with everybody: I'm in a bit of an identity crisis right now. My first blog was "The Spiky Haired One's Thoughts", but everyone told me that could apply to every other guy they come across on the street. So, I just threw in my hair color in there, but then everyone pointed out that Zack Fair had dark spiky hair, too. Another conundrum! I was hoping to settle on "The One and Only Keyblade Master's Thoughts"…but then it turned out I couldn't _Inception_ my way out of sleep during the master exam. So, Riku's a Keyblade Master instead of me now because he was the one who figured out how to get me out of it. Which, yeah, totally cool, the pressure's off me! :D

It's just I don't know what to call this blog now. Help?

 **Comments:**

 _How about "I'm Just a Key, on Capitol Tree"?_

Roxas

 _*sigh* Really, dude?_

Sora

 _Hey, it was worth a shot! :D_

Roxas

 _How bad's the identity crisis getting?_

Riku

 _Eh, not that bad, Riku. I'm just in a bit of a writer's block. I've stayed up a couple nights to make pudding, though, since I figure that's how the ideas will flow. But, nope, nada! Closest I came up with for a new title was "Key Ring Holder Guy's Thoughts"._

Sora

 _How about…"Everyman Keyman"?_

Kairi

 _^This is why we're dating right here! I love you, babe. *3 hearts emojis*_

Sora

 _I figured that'd be a good one! Love you back. *kissy face*_

Kairi

 _Barf!_

Axel

 _Oh, come off it, Axel/Lea!_

Kairi

 _Ouch. You know that's a sore spot with me, Princess._

Axel/Lea

 _OK, now you're just trolling. -_-_

Kairi

 _Just a question, though…Wouldn't_ Inception _-ing yourself mean getting further_ _into dream-sleep? How does one_ Inception _oneself out of a deep coma-like sleep like yours?_

Xion

 _The little top thing falls down._

Sora

 _Nooooooooooooooooo!_

Roxas

* * *

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Sora, dude, spoilers!

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** Spoilers for, like, a 10-year-old movie? Come on, Roxas, catch up. Did you get holed up in some sort of pop culture cave or something?

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Well, yeah, kind of. I don't pay attention to movies much. What else happened?

 **GingerSpiceFlower:** They've started making live-action versions of Disney cartoons. They have perfected the comic book movie assembly line so that at least five of them come out every year. They brought Star Wars back from the abyss. All from the same company! And you can watch new movies on your computer or phone. We have seen things…many movie things that you wouldn't believe.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Hm. Kairi, the way you put it, all of that sounds both awesome and terrifying at the same time. Maybe more terrifying, actually.

 **AntiAnybody14:** That's more or less about the right state of feeling to have. Good instincts, Rox!

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Whoa, when's the asteroid coming?

 **DarthSuperior:** When the number of Xehanort clones surpasses the feasible mathematical limit and become infinite.

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** Oh, crap!

*everyone except **DarthSuperior** signs off*

* * *

 **Aces High**

 **Luxord**

I think I ought to use this new and improved site as a chance to share parts of my drafted manuscript so far. Xion suggests I should focus less on online gambling, and she has a very valid point. I did feel a general hollow sense after a while when the stakes kept getting higher and higher with diminishing returns. So, I have turned toward a new outlet to express myself.

Enjoy!

 _King Reginald's coronation ceremony was a sight to behold! As he knelt in nervous anticipation, his breath a-quiver from suppressed emotions, he chanced a glimpse at the emerald-and-sapphire-encrusted crown that was to go upon his visage. It gleamed with the lights of a thousand stars, as though teeming with the glittering eyes of past kings, ancestors who fought valiant battles and courted many a worthy damsel. Perhaps he too could prove worthy of this crown that he would don for all of time. That mere glimpse of the luxurious chapeau was so dazzling that he could feel the tears spring to his eyes._

 **Comments:**

 _Um, that was something. I don't know if it was objectively "good", but it was something._

Axel

 _I will take that as a compliment, sir!_

Luxord

 _Axel may not be well-versed in literary criticism, but I certainly am. I have to say that was a stunningly awful passage. Your first mistake was to say the coronation ceremony was impressive but mention nothing of the court or the guests in attendance. Secondly, you focus too much attention on that garishly awful crown that's apparently such a great relic. But, I would say your worst offense is that it's clear you sleep with a thesaurus next to you and don't know how to bloody edit! This "attempt" at writing is offensive to my eyes, and I wish you'd start gambling again._

Zexion

 _Zexion…You saying I'm stupid, man?_

Axel

 _Wow…That was the most I've ever read from Zex or heard him speak, for that matter. That was some brutal critique there. Sorry, Luxord._

Xion

 _Did you like it, Xion?_

Luxord

 _Too much pressure! I'm out._

Xion

 _I liked it…adequately, but I am willing to offer my services as an editor._

Saix

 _IT SUCKED!_

Xigbar

 _You have the beginnings of a solid Harlequin career! That's something!_

Kairi

 _I totally am not reading one of those bodice-rippers right now. Nope. So in no way do I condone this and would like a full book complete with medieval intimacy. That's not me. *whispers*_ _That's totally me!_

Olette

* * *

 **A/N: The pudding thing is referencing Stu Pickles making pudding for Angelica at 3 AM b/c he's "lost control of his life". I'd forgotten about it, but as a gif, this bit has definitely made a bit of a resurgence, probably b/c in adulthood, this is relateable, lol! Just figured the "identity crisis" was Sora kinda losing control of his life a little bit. And Zexion's rant was inspired by a similarly overly elaborate comment/rant I received once from someone who was a total jerk. Making lemonade out of lemons there, for sure!**

 **Once again, thanks for the continued support. Now hoping I don't lose power at the house tomorrow, no thanks to this terrible friggin' snow. One hopes anyway...XP**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: All right, guys, it is OFFICIALLY ONE WEEK BEFORE KH3! So exciting! I wonder if some of my predictions will come true, and I can't wait to find out. Anyway, I'm going to start updating two chapters at a time. Still not sure if I'll have a consistent update schedule (thanks, job, lol), but I'll try to aim for Fridays/Saturdays. I just wanted to update today to celebrate it being one week away, I can't believe it's almost here.**

* * *

 **Chapter 4**

 **Diary of an Artist**

 **Namine**

I shouldn't have said anything about my relationship with Axel ending, because now that seems like that's what anyone wants to talk about! Larxene wanted to know when I'd release my expose post on it, and sorry Larx, but there's not much to tell. We had our thing for a couple months, went out on five dates, had three dinners…But, OK, guys, if you're curious, it did seem like this shadow would be following us. I don't mean that as a metaphor, it felt like some disapproving shadow was watching everything we did. Axel doesn't take much stock in omens, I kind of do…So that was that.

And I'm really happy living the single life, guys. Don't you worry about that, I'm definitely not desperate for anyone any time soon! ^_^

 **Comments:**

 _Was the shadow Chris Hansen?_

Marluxia

 _Again with the Chris Hansen! This is well past relevant any more. And besides, Marluxia, I have my own issues with you!_ *glares*

Namine

 _You are far too confident online. :P_

Marluxia

 _And you've proven to be creepy in the past. I'm sitting in on this conversation, so I can monitor it VERY carefully. Don't be messing with my best friend, Marls!_

Xion

 _Oh, fie, you are no better than an intrusive fly, Xion. You know that Larxene and I were just passing the time when we'd have her run back and forth with snacks for us, because we wanted to spend our time engaging in our more…sensual pursuits._

Marluxia

 _Ew…EW!_

Xion

 _Like back massages. ;)_

Marluxia

 _Why do my posts always have threads like these? *facepalm*_

Namine

 _Yeah, Nam, you were just trying to clear the air about us to everyone, even though it's really nobody but Chris Hansen's shadow's business. Leave it to Flower Boy to make things worse._

Axel

… _.Wait, that really was his shadow? 0_0_

Namine

 _Um, yeah, Zexion told me so. That's when he also broke the news to me that I was 21. Makes some odd amount of sense when you think about it…_

Axel

 _The World That Never Was really is the Twilight Zone, wow! Snatches of 2007 will just show up out of the blue._

Roxas

 _A topic worthy of further research! Perhaps it is my time machine's influence!_

Vexen

… _Nobody really cares that much, Vexen._

Xion

 _They do when he's getting mixed up with bounced checks now. This is what happens when we bring past-relevant names out into the universe. 0_0_

Roxas

 _Hm, wonder what that'd mean with Tom from MySpace, speaking of 2007…_

Xion

 _Ooh, stay tuned!_

Larxene

* * *

 **A Day in the Life**

 **Xion**

Well, so far so good, guys! Some of the blog posts have been weird, but I mean, that's another day for the Org. as far as that goes (let's be real, it's mostly been us). I'm used to it, I got to combat it with my usual wise-ass commentary but nothing too severe yet. Don't throw any curveballs, Xigbar, they will not be appreciated.

As for me, I did get to go out with Riku the other day, off to the islands for our anniversary. I never thought our online banter would translate to anything substantial, but hey, we lucked out! I get not everyone can have the relationship we have, so I try not to take that for granted. Especially since I'm technically related to Sora through being a shadow of a shadow, and I wonder what the optics of that are and whether or not I could legitimately disappear at any moment. 0_0

Sorry for the existentialism, been listening to a lot of Radiohead on the new sound system, which is gorgeous by the way! Thanks again, Lexaeus, for providing that for us. I know you don't get appreciated enough around here, so I'm more than willing to find any excuse to give you a shout-out.

 **Comments:**

 _I'm happy to help with that all things considered, Xion. As long as we can avoid another incident like Axel's inept thievery, I'll be content. Leon trying to break into HQ really disturbed my naps._

Lexaeus

 _Why don't you have a blog of your own, dude?_

Demyx

 _Hmm…You know, I never thought about it. I prefer to stoically read others' posts, although the comments do make me chuckle every now and again. They are the best part of the site._

Lexaeus

 _Oh, so you're a lurker! Well, there's always one of those. Maybe there's more around than we think. Xigbar definitely lurks more than posts/comments, hmmm…_

Demyx

 _I'm doing research to take all of you down. It's all a part of the master plan, dudes._ *sly grin emoji* _Or is it?_

Xigbar

 _^Um…OK then. Ignoring that, happy anniversary to you too, babe. The best things always happen on accident._ *heart emoji*

Riku

 _Aw!_

Xion

 _That's what my parents always said to me too!_

Larxene

… _So many random comments here today, jeez._

Sora

 _It wasn't theft! That box was literally just sitting out there, and I thought those CDs would be given away for free! Eh, never mind. Clearly, everyone's still got that memorized. -_-_

Axel

 _An iconic moment in Org. history! *heart emoji*_

Xion

* * *

 **A/N: It's kinda weird that there's no ages on most of these characters-heck, Axel could be anywhere from 19 to 25 for all I know! And no lie, I added to this when the new Chris Hansen story came out, three days when I first wrote on this! Very odd.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

 **Shopping=4ever**

 **Selphie**

You Org. XIII types should consider yourselves lucky that I got a tablet recently—much more maneuverable and easier to carry around and protect. I could have sued all of your butts off for property damage and personal stress, pain, and suffering! Laptops aren't cheap, you know. Yeah, I got that replacement one too…but I don't trust you all NOT to break into my house and smash it into bits again. And you call yourselves men. REAL gentlemen wouldn't have done any of what you did, hmph!

For the rest of you who aren't jerks, my life has otherwise been going very swimmingly! ^_^ I'm still going out with my perfect, handsome boyfriend Irvine, and we've been going everywhere together. He'll even tag along on my shopping trips and carry my bags, so lovely! Meanwhile, I'm like 99.9999999999% sure that the Org. men don't know how to clean behind their ears, much less know how to treat a lady with any shred of respect and human decency. But, who cares, right? I'll let bygones be bygones. Like my mother and Kairi have been telling me, it's no good to hold onto grudges (and Axel kidnapped Kairi, so the fact she forgives you now is really something, sir, don't take her kindness for granted!).

Anyway, here's Irvy and I!

*twelve couple selfies of Selphie and Irvine are included in this post*

 **Comments:**

… _Where do I start?_

Saix

 _How about not? Selphie's obviously been done with you guys for a while now, and none of you should really be anywhere near her house. So, you know the drill. I'm perched right on my keister, monitoring. Watching. Waiting. Behave yourselves!_

Xion

 _K, Mom. :P_

Demyx

*cringe* _You know I'm not that responsible to be anyone's mother, jeez._

Xion

 _I was just kidding! Heh. You know I'm one of the .1% who manages to keep in line._

Demyx

 _I was merely offended at the implication I don't clean behind my ears. Considering how sizeable mine are, I have to be extra meticulous with mine when showering._

Saix

 _Fascinating._ *eyeroll*

Roxas

 _Aw, you two look so cute together! I'm glad your life is going well, Selph. I hope it continues that way, and no one in the Org. tries to wreck your stuff again (that includes you, Axel)._

Kairi

 _Who do you think we are, Vikings? Man oh man, why've I been the one getting singled out lately? That was literally one time, I'm not in the kidnapping biz, unlike some of my…should I call them peers? 'Sides, you say bygones, but it sounds like you're still taking things personal._

Axel

 _Just enjoy my cutesy pics with my b/f. :P_

Selphie

… _Is the hair supposed to be some sort of fashion statement of his or something?_

Axel

 _Somebody's feeling extra persnickety today. :D_

Kairi

 _Oh, shove off._

Axel

 _Damn, Axe, this isn't like you. Are you OK?_

Xion

 _Take a guess. *sigh*_

Axel

 _I'll deal with this. Sorry, guys, we just had an argument._

Roxas

* * *

 **Pyromania** : Guys, I'm fine. I've just been dealing with some weirdly emotional things, like I said. Maybe I'll get this Lea/Axel thing figured out, but for now, ugh, I'm screwed-up!

 **AntiAnybody14** : You are so not screwed-up. And even if you are, we're all in the same boat! We're all mad here and everything.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** How about that you both have your Axel and Lea sides, right? You're not just Lea, even though you got that side of you back. And you're still the snarky Axel we know and put up with. :P So…Even if you go by Lea now, that doesn't mean you give Axel up. Does that make sense? K, maybe not, cuz now I'm confused, lol.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Yeah, I, for one, am more than willing to call you Lea! Even if I still think it's a dumb name, it _was_ the name you were stuck with since birth. Really, three-ish years of being Axel was nothing compared to your true name, right?

 **GingerSpiceFlower** : Axel is a pretty darn catchy name, but these guys are right. You're back on "our" side, you can drop the "X", and no one will judge you for it. Anyone who does has to go through us! *signs off*

 **Exorcised16:** I say pick whatever name you're comfortable with going by. 'Sides, we're still in the bubble, right? Anything goes.

 **SitarHero9:** *sings* We're livin' in a bubble! You can't help yourself from fallllliiiing!

 **Pyromania:** Eh, Axel it is for now! That way, things don't get too dicey for the other Org. guys (and girl), at least on this blog. 'Sides, I'm still kind of attached to it, in a kinda masochistic way. You guys, tho, you can call me Lea if you want. You're the only people worth messing with as friends to call me that.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Well, AxelLea….!

 **Exorcised16:** Oh, babe, you and your dad jokes. :P Was that really supposed to be a play on "actually"? For real?

 **AntiAnybody14:** You know it!

 **Exorcised16:** Wow, why are we dating again? Lol.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Because I'm irresistibly, hopelessly, incredibly really, really, really good-looking? Oh, and funny!

 **Exorcised16:** Yeah, that's right. Thanks for reminding me! XD

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Ugh, looks like the lovebirds are going to be hijacking the chat again. Wanna play some DDR, guys?

 **SitarHero9:** I'm so whipping your asses this time!

 **Pyromania:** Just don't rely on your water clones, Dem, that's frickin' cheating!

 **SitarHero9:** Awwww, man, you're still no fun, Lea!

 **Pyromania** : :P Haven't changed that much to ya, have I?

* **UWILLH8MYCAPS** , **SitarHero9** , and **Pyromania** all sign off*

 **AntiAnybody14:** Well, lovie, it just now became Chatroom After Dark! Want to continue the flirty banter?

 **Exorcised16:** Xi, you know that's all I live for w/ these chats. :P

* **AntiAnybody14** and **Exorcised16** stay on chat for 5 more hours*

* * *

 **A/N: I figured there's gotta be a little angst factor w/Axel going back to Lea while he still has ties to the Org. in a couple respects, so I was kinda tapping into that psychological drama. Nothing major.**

 **Well, that's prob. my update for the week, at least until Sat.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hello again, guys. To think, here in the US, it's only three days til KH3! It's practically on top of us. I'm stuck indoors, as is typical for living in a Midwestern winter. Oof, it's going to get ugly this week. So, since I'm lounging at home tonight, what better to do than to update?**

* * *

 **Chapter 6**

 **Music is Life**

 **Demyx**

OK, yeah, so the guys kicked my ass pretty hard at DDR yesterday *sigh*. Look, I really am so much better at it with my clones! Otherwise, just because I'm the guy with the sitar and can make music doesn't mean I can dance to music all that well. Why else do you think I say "dance, water, dance" to summon my clones? They're the ones coming up with all the moves, not me. Nobody wants to see me groove to "Smooth".

But, OK, for some of the inquiring minds out there, if you really want to know: Axel is the best dancer, but I'd say it's close between those two. On the game anyway, he scores higher than Roxas by thismuch, because you know Roxas has that boy bander thing going on, right? That's where the real competition is. And, I mean, have you seen Axel's hips? Pfft, then again, even Xion can beat me at this game, and she flails around like one of those inflatable tube men with the spaghetti arms.

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, Dem, come on! I'm a gorgeous dancer, I am_ Sweet Charity _AND_ Chicago _levels of good!_

Xion

 _Xi, I love you, but no, you're not. Demyx's description is…actually…pretty accurate, lol._

Riku

 _All right, fair, but I can dream, right? Besides, Mr. Two Left Feet, you have no room to talk! We haven't slow danced very often, but whenever we have, you keep tripping over my ankles and grabbing my entire waist instead of my shoulders._

Xion

 _I mean, height difference, tho?_

Riku

 _Well, guess we can't take them to any ballroom dance classes for double date nights, huh, Roxas?_

Olette

 _Nope! XD_

Roxas

 _Ugh, who would want to do that for a date anyway? Booooring! :P_

Xion

 _Yeah, what's wrong with zip-lining? :P_

Riku

 _NOW you're talking, my love!_

Xion

 _Adrenaline junkies…-_-_

Roxas

 _Oh, come on, Roxas, you're just jealous. Don't you just want to feel the blood rush to your head when you go bungee jumping with Olette one of these times?_

Riku

 _Oh hell no, we are not doing that! D:_

Olette

 _You're going to try to be one of those obnoxious couples who need constant "energy" from nature, aren't you? Diving off high cliffs, camping without a tent, what-have-you. And, then to top it all off, there's going to be a "spontaneous" proposal while you guys are hiking. Yet, somehow, there's going to be 20 different pics of the same view, b/c you hired some dude on a helicopter to capture the moment. Blech._

Roxas

 _Uh, we like to go outside once in a while, what are you talking about? We'd never do most of that…except that proposal sounds really nice, not gonna lie!_

Xion

 _Well, good! I was getting worried for a sec._

Roxas

 _Yeah, adrenaline rushes are all well and good, just don't die, lol._

Olette

 _This whole thread makes me glad I'm single! ^_^_

Demyx

 _Again with this obsession with my hips! Come on! :P_

Axel

 _Well…..They don't lie._

Demyx

 _Boooooo!_

Roxas

* * *

 **Subject: Missing Personal Item**

I seem to have misplaced my lexicon, of all things, a few days ago, and it has yet to turn up. I know much of you will probably find this hilarious, as my go-to weapon can expand to a size bigger than your heads. It also makes for a good bug swatter as well. Be that as it may, I suspect that it was stolen. For what purpose, I do not know, though it does not cooperate with anyone other than me. Whoever the possible thief is will more than likely dispose of it soon once they realize this. It does have a mind of its own, after all. Anyone who exposes the thief to me will be richly rewarded—I currently have an unopened box of delicious fudge in my possession.

 **Posted by: Zexion**

 **Comments:**

 _I am astonished that I haven't seen it pop up, since I've been helping you look for it since Tuesday. I'm sure it's still in the castle._

Lexaeus

 _Hopefully so. Thanks for your help anyway, Lexaeus._

Zexion

 _That's what good friends and colleagues are for. :) Although it's a shame—I meant to try that fudge._

Lexaeus

 _Who would want your weapon anyway? It isn't even sharp!_

Larxene

 _I'll have you know I've gotten papercuts from it before, and it is not a pleasant experience._

Zexion

 _OK, fine, I took it. I thought it was going to be a big book of Dark Arts because it had the pentagram on the cover. But, there's not much there, kid!_

Xigbar

 _Xigbar. I should have known. :P_

Zexion

 _BTW, it is not a pentagram, it is a very important alchemy sign, very scientific. But, I wouldn't have expected you to know that._

Zexion

 _If you're going to "shame" me on the site, whatever, I might as well give it back to you. Not much fun doing this research if everyone else knows about it. Besides, the illusions in here aren't that great. I mean, they're not even fun like the ones they show at Vegas._

Xigbar

 _Did someone mention Las Vegas?!_

Luxord

 _No. Of course they're not cheap Vegas illusions, they are scientifically based. I am a logician at heart, not a party trick show-off._ *glare*

Zexion

 _Sounds like your whole plot of taking all of us down is working wonders so far, Xigbar. XP_

Xaldin

 _Eh, long as we're in the bubble, I can't do a thing. We'll see how KH3 goes, when I know all the cards… ;) So, since I'm going to be returning that big useless tome to you, do I get the fudge?_

Xigbar

 _Absolutely not. Idiot._

Zexion

* * *

 **Mastering Illusions, Telling People off 24/7**

 **Zexion**

I'm glad to have gotten my lexicon back, although I found it odd that Xigbar so willingly gave it up. This is the man who, if you venture near his chambers, you will find wall-to-wall lasers. He might seem all laid-back, but he obviously prizes security above many things. Perhaps he can outwit us all, but it is a competition. Observing my fellow Organization members is like watching a big cat documentary on PBS. You just never know when any one of them will strike. Myself included. In fact, I might as well let everyone in on a little secret since I'm not a fighter by nature: there are, in fact, _some_ Dark Arts spells here and there throughout the lexicon, but only I can see them. The pages change according to whoever has it in possession—what Xigbar mainly saw were geometry proofs and recipes for all kinds of stew. In other words, dull stuff to him.

Oh, the fudge? I may have eaten it all already. *smug smile emoji*

 **Comments:**

 _Number Two most certainly knows more than what he lets on a great deal of the time, but he is just as prone to vanity and impulsivity like the rest of us. It's like living in a powder keg, I concur! But, Zexion, you couldn't be bothered to share your fudge with us, your downstairs colleagues?! Outrageous!_

Vexen

 _Vexen, I will say first and foremost I am not behooved to either of you in that way, considering Castle Oblivion is long behind us (thank Kingdom Hearts). And another thing, can't I at least have one thing of my own? It's already bad enough that you keep wanting to borrow my scientific equipment every chance you get. I barely get to use it._

Zexion

 _Oh, cry more about it! I am at least making strides in time travel while you're in your room reading your silly fantasy books!_

Vexen

 _Sharing would have been more considerate, Zex._

Lexaeus

 _Yes, well…It's not every day one acquires fudge._

Zexion

 _I have just recently caught up to the site's recent posts. Are you meaning to tell me that was the fate of MY fudge?_

Saix

 _Now, you did it, Braniac. Messing with Saix's anything is never a good move. Hope tonight's not a full moon, heh-heh-heh. :P_

Axel

* * *

 **Days of One who Loathes Everyone**

 **Saix**

I have taught Number Six the consequences of stealing, which is ironic considering he was a victim of theft so recently. Even the most intelligent of teenagers can prove to be so foolish in that regard. I am tired of being utterly disrespected here day in, day out. Even when I want a moment of peace, someone wants to disrupt it because it's me they want to trifle with. Do not be fooled by my number, I am in reality much higher up than virtually EVERYONE here. Bear that in mind.

 **Comments:**

 _Don't fret too much, Saix. The lexicon's pages have already reappeared. *smug smile emoji*_

Zexion

 _How?!_

Saix

 _The lexicon has its own secrets that I myself can't even begin to delve into. That and what about "Dark Arts", did you not understand?_

Zexion

 _Sure taught him!_

Axel

 _Why must you comment on every damn thing I post, Axel? And you are almost always…What do they call it…? Ah,_ trolling _, besides! And if that wasn't enough, I still haven't forgotten about the time you burned my hair or the time that you threw my claymore out the closest window. The fact that we ever knew each other in a past life escapes my comprehension. Why would that have ever happened?_

Saix

 _I don't know. Why don't you tell me, Isa?!_

Axel

… _.._

Saix

 _I feel as though I'm in the middle of something. Perhaps I will take up some_ Discworld _and sign out, yes?_

Zexion

* * *

 **A/N: I'll say right now that I plan to make the Axel/Saix dynamic an ongoing thing that'll pop every other couple of chapters or so-ever since knowing how deep their backstory goes, I've found their friendship/rivalry to be really fascinating.**

 **Other highlights: well, I def. have come to share the fan theory-maybe not so much a theory-that Xigbar knows more than what he lets on in general. And I actually have never read any of the Discworld books but have been meaning to get around to them. Maybe I'll give Mort a try at some point this year, who knows?**

 **As promised, the second chapter will be up very shortly.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: My first dabbling at a two-chapter (in this case anyway, perhaps multi-chapter arcs will happen in the future) arc. You'll see what I mean.**

* * *

 **Chapter 7**

 **ElectricLady12:** *signs in* Come over.

 **Roses4Life:** To your room? That's down the hall from mine? What are you getting on about, Larxene?

 **ElectricLady12:** I've booked us a room in that low-key hotel in Traverse Town. The Honeymoon Suite. ;)

 **Roses4Life:** Oh, indeed? We could most certainly use the getaway from our fellow Org. dolts.

 **ElectricLady12:** That's what I was thinking!

 **Roses4Life:** The sheer decadence of it! We could share a box of chocolate-covered cherries while I recite poetry to you. Keats, Browning, Wordsworth, Dickinson…

 **ElectricLady12** : Which Browning?

 **Roses4Life:** Both of them!

 **ElectricLady12:** Ooooh! And we can pledge our love to the moon and stars…

 **Roses4Life:** And all the other worlds, even the ones we don't care about…

 **ElectricLady12:** To unite in love and pain…

 **Roses4Life:** For all of time!

 **Pyromania:** *signs in* Can I come along?

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** *signs in* Aaaaaaay!

 **ElectricLady12:** Marluxia, what is this?! I thought our chatroom was specifically password-protected so people like these twats wouldn't intrude!

 **Roses4Life:** Er, yes…

 **ElectricLady12** : What was the password you came up with?

 **Roses4Life:** *sigh* 1112.

 **ElectricLady12:** Are you kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

 **Pyromania:** Uh-oh, Romeo, you're in trouble!

 **Roses4Life:** Silence, you! Larx, I just thought it would be romantic to have our numbers joined together.

 **ElectricLady12:** Your password might as well have been freaking 1-2-3! Ugh, I can't even think about looking at you right now. I'm gonna ask for a refund here, then I'm just teleporting back to my room. Over this!

* **ElectricLady12** signs out*

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Shouldn't have had your number first in the pword, bro. A chick like Larxene needs to know that she's first all the time.

 **Roses4Life:** I hope you're happy! I was going to have the best night in my life for months, and you go and ruin it by being the irksome pranksters you are.

 **Pyromania:** That's what makes us so loveable! :D

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS** : Don't tell me you haven't thought about hacking a password-protected chatroom!

 **Roses4Life:** I WILL UNLEASH FIRE AND FURY ON THE BOTH OF YOU!

 **Pyromania:** Hey, hey! I believe I'M the fire guy in the Org.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS** : And come on, Marl, you got more important priorities at the moment. Like saving your relationship?

* **Pyromania** and **UWILLH8MYCAPS** sign out*

 **Roses4Life:** Larxene, I really am sorry. I normally wouldn't be this foolish, and I will give you so many bouquets to prove my love!

* **Roses4Life** signs out*

* * *

 **Years of Flowers**

 **Marluxia**

This is going to look sickeningly shameless, but anyone at the castle can see it: I'm a broken man. I have never been so close to the brink of destroying my relationship with Larxene. I've never seen her so angry. I will do what I can to rectify the situation, as it's mostly my fault in the first place for coming up with such a terrible password. However, it is highly evident to me that certain pranksters have nothing better to do on a Saturday night than to guess passwords to certain protected areas of this website!

P.S. Larxene, if you see this, I apologize immensely. This should never have happened.

 **Comments:**

 _I shouldn't have freaked out on you like that…when we both know who's at fault. :( Oh, and apology accepted, honey! *heart eyes emoji*_

Larxene

 _I…had thought it would take more work to win you back. You mean you weren't thinking about breaking up with me?! :)_

Marluxia

 _Of course not! Who else can I share my passions with and take over the world with? Besides, I can never stay angry with you for long._

Larxene

 _As is usually the case, darling. Now, what to do about our little pests?_

Marluxia

 _Uh, yeah, dude, we might be in trouble._

Roxas

 _Don't tell me I have to bail you guys out of a sitch again!_

Xion

* * *

 **Tales of a Nobody Nothing**

 **Roxas**

Uh, yeah, Axel and I might need to reevaluate how we pull pranks, because we're better at dishing things out than taking them. We're currently hanging out at Twilight Town and making sure we're as far from HQ as possible at the moment. I'm typing this over at a web café, actually. Don't worry, guys, we'll come up with something good when Marluxia and Larxene try to retaliate against us. I can't tell you what it will be yet—and besides, do you think I'm going to spell out everything online like this?—but it will be epic!

That and it's been nice to hang with the old gang again!

 **Comments:**

 _Hey, no problem, man! You guys are free to lay low here as long as you need._

Hayner

 _And thanks for introducing us to your BFF! Lea is def. way cooler than Axel!_

Pence

 _Uh, dude, I'm literally both Lea and Axel in one. I just go by Axel to most everyone—except friends—cuz it's easier at this point._

Axel

 _But you don't go around kidnapping people in front of other people (i.e. us) anymore, so that makes you different, right?_

Pence

 _Suuuuuuure. Thanks for the ice cream earlier btw, you know I'm always down for some sea-salt!_

Axel

 _Why are you guys all talking to each other like this when I'm the only one back at the usual spot, and you're all at the web café right now? *_ thinking face emoji _*_

Olette

 _We were just in the middle of a campaign, you wouldn't understand. :P_

Hayner

 _Yeah, those orcs mean serious biz-ness this time!_

Pence

 _Nerds! XP_

Olette

 _Well, we know where you're at, so we might as well portal over right now! :)_

Larxene

 _Patience, love. Remember to stay true to good form. We'll wait for them to return, and THEN, we will launch our surprise attack._

Marluxia

 _You do realize we can read all this, right? -_-_

Roxas

 _Oh, we will so pwn you!_

Axel

 _Guys, I'll meet up and work on strategy with you soon!_

Xion

 _Cool, cool. But, me and the guys really need to torch these orcs' asses right now. The fate of the realm is at stake!_

Roxas

 _Nerds!_

Xion

* * *

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

K, I just want to get this out of my system: LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA JENKINS!

 **Comments:**

 _Erm, I haven't tinkered with the time machine in quite a while._

Vexen

 _*facepalm* The dad humor is strong with this one._

Sora

 _And the use of that meme would mean we failed epicly. Our_ WoW _campaign today actually went over pretty well, I thought._

Pence

 _^Got some pretty sweet weapon upgrades, too! :D_

Hayner

 _Do we bring back Rick Rolls while we're at it? :P_

Riku

* * *

 **A/N: Well, pop culture must have died in 2007 or I'm heavily dating myself with all these references...Oh well! Yes, this is the start of, as you might have guessed, a bit of a prank war. What craziness will ensue? Hm...**

 **I wanted Larxene and Marluxia to have that Team Rocket dynamic going on, thus the weird vow to each other. I was also trying to not play their argument too much for laughs, because I didn't want to seem as though I was making fun of a relationship by making it toxic. You see it in old cartoons, it's not great. So a bit of a subversion there.**

 **And once again, my update schedule will be sketchy, this time no thanks to more work hours. Nothing's more of a motivation killer for me than being tired from work. But, I'll try to persevere and get far enough ahead to do a two-chapters-an-update format whenever I do update. I hope to update on at least a weekly basis. I hope you all can bear with me, and if you do, thank you for understanding!**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hey, guys! I had a bit of a crazy work week last week, so I didn't get around to uploading like I wanted to. Oh well, I figured this would happen going into this. Sooo, KH3 is now out! Congrats to everyone who gets to play it! I still haven't gotten around to the cutscenes yet but plan watching them soon along with gameplay footage. It does look like it's a fun game gameplay-wise! Hope you enjoy today's updates. And as promised last time, the prank war begins...**

* * *

 **Chapter 8**

 **I'm Crazy Evil**

 **Larxene**

I had the perfect plan to take these vermin on, I really did! But, I'm incapacitated right now and don't have the energy to move, let alone get to my booby traps. I think it was something I ate…I DID get some chocolate-covered cherries from Marluxia this morning. But, ohhh, I feel lousy. :( Something's not right with this…

 **Comments:**

 _You're right, love, because I didn't send you anything this morning. 0_0_

Marluxia

 _But, it was in your handwriting! Ugh, it was good forgery, wasn't it?_

Larxene

 _:)_

Xion

 _You know something, you little brat, don't you?! Ughhhhhh, I need to get to a toilet, brb._

Larxene

 _I don't know much other than it sounds like you got a massive pwning._

Xion

 _Insufferable scourge!_

Marluxia

 _Don't worry, Flower Boy, you're next. ;)_

Axel

* * *

 **Years of Flowers**

 **Marluxia**

Axel is as bad as his word, for what little that's worth. My hair products have all been replaced with cooking oils and shortening! I LOOK ATROCIOUS!

 **Comments:**

 _*high-fives Axel*_

Roxas

 _*high-fives Roxas* Hey, you came up with the plan, little buddy. I just executed it. ;)_

Axel

 _Is that why your hair is dripping with grease? I thought that was your Axe gel! OK, that's it, this is war!_

Larxene

* * *

 **Tales of a Nobody Nothing**

 **Roxas**

Those horrible "people" just cut the cords to my consoles. All six of them. This is personal—leave the video games out of this! They did nothing to you!

 **Comments:**

 _No more DDR?! T_T_

Demyx

 _Not for the foreseeable future anyway. I'm sure I can get new cords, but it's the principle of the thing, OK? This is dirty, even by Marluxia & Larxene standards._

Roxas

 _Good, perhaps your addiction to these silly video games of yours will be cured._

Marluxia

 _They're not silly to me, some of them can actually be considered artistic! You don't see me cutting up your boring old-school poetry books, do you? Oh, wait a minute…_

Roxas

 _What. Did. You. DO?!_

Marluxia

 _You might want to check the library over by your shelves. :P_

Roxas

 _Dang, this is really ramping up. I'm feeling a bit hot under the collar. This is quite the rush anyway!_

Axel

 _You decimated my book of Keats! You shall pay dearly._

Marluxia

 _Arrrrrrrgh, that was my fave that you'd read me!_

Larxene

 _Uh, Rox, desecrating books is going a bit far._

Xion

 _He shouldn't have messed with my consoles!_

Roxas

 _Agreed with Xion. We're getting near the reprehensible side of things here._

Zexion

 _It was just one book, chill. *smug smile emoji*_

Roxas

 _I'll show you "one book"…_

Larxene

* * *

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

Whoa, this is getting out-of-hand now. I thought this prank war would be fun, but it really isn't any more. I got my stash of cupcakes swapped out for cilantro and parsley. The hell am I supposed to do with those? Neither one of them are particularly that great for calories (and definitely not a good replacement for my sugar fix), why didn't they just give me seaweed while they were at it? Ugh.

 **Comments:**

 _Mwahahahaha! I can't take all the credit, though, they are from Marluxia's garden, after all._

Larxene

 _These so-called prank wars are getting to be both irksome and troublesome indeed. 11 and 12, I'm going to need you to properly make amends to 8 and 13 and vice versa…I'd rather this happen now, before this escalates any further and the castle itself becomes at risk._

Xemnas

 _Frankly, Superior, I don't see how these meddlesome troublemakers need an apology from yours truly. They interfered with what was to be a lovely midnight tryst between my Larxene and me._

Marluxia

 _That was your own fault, 11. Both of you could have simply ignored the intrusion to your chatroom._

Xemnas

 _How do you know about that?!_

Larxene

 _In one manner of speaking, the whole castle now knows of this ridiculous tiff of yours at this point. In another, I could also possibly have access to the entirety of blogs and chatrooms on this site. Consider all that carefully._

Xemnas

 _Sorry for your greasy hair, Marluxia! :D_

Roxas

 _Sorry for those laxative "chocolates", Lightning Bug!_

Axel

 _Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!_

Larxene

* * *

 **Ramblings from a Sith Lord**

 **Xemnas**

Well, I was to update today, but the electricity at the castle is now out. How unfortunate.

*Three hours later, after power is restored*

 **Comments:**

 _This has gone on long enough. 8 and 13, in their own irritating way, have put up a truce. It is time for you, 11 and 12, to reciprocate it. I will not ask again. The castle's electrical power should not be a bargaining chip._

Xemnas

 _Agreed. I was blow-drying my hair when the outage occurred, and that could have led to some dire consequences for both my hair and, more importantly, my person. :(_

Saix

 _Guys, efrigginnough already!_

Xion

 _I had a pizza in the oven!_

Xaldin

 _My newest experiment was disrupted, and now I have to start over!_

Vexen

 _I was in the middle of_ Hogfather, _how dare you. I had to read by candlelight for three hours, and it was truly a struggle._

Zexion

 _Yeah, man, I'm getting bored with this. What was this whole thing over again anyway?_

Axel

 _All right. Fine. I apologize._

Marluxia

 _Larxene?_

Roxas

 _Forget it! I'll cause another outage until everyone gets the point!_

Larxene

 _Please, love, this is getting exhausting._

Marluxia

 _Hey, if you want me to come over and take care of the "Lightning Bug" again, I'll do it. XD_

Sora

 _Oh God, not you again…Fine, fine. I'm sorry, OK?_

Larxene

 _See, that wasn't so hard! ^_^_

Xion

 _This whole thing's been a trip._

Namine

* * *

 **A/N: I gotta admit, I too would have to draw the line at destroying books (unless it's Ayn Rand's stuff tbh). I mean, come on, what have they done to anyone?! XD**

 **So, guys, even though I still have not sat down and gone through the cutscenes yet, I did kinda spoil myself w/ a big spoiler last night (figures my resistance to not doing that is getting weaker by the day...). And, yeah, the writers certainly made a choice with that, one that I'm not happy about. But, and I'm not making this up, I legit had a dream late last week that heavily, heavily implied this spoiler. So, is it really a spoiler for me personally? Hmmm...Apart from that, I will be as spoiler-free as possible going into these scenes. I hope they wrapped things up well enough otherwise!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

 **Years of Flowers**

 **Marluxia**

As much as my pride suffered at this disgrace of character on my part, I did ultimately participate in a truce with Axel and Roxas. I made reparations by way of providing Roxas with new consoles with intact cords and…don't make me say this, Superior, I know you're watching…Fine, very well, I gave Axel damn chocolate chip cookies to make up for his so-called junk food drought. Not like he needed junk food. If he was sincere about kicking the habit entirely, he would take advantage of my fresh produce from the garden. But, I suppose he truly is sixteen at heart, or so he says.

Peace has been relatively restored, more or less. However, as much as I love her, I do predict Larxene will be a much tougher nut to crack.

 **Comments:**

 _You bet I am, my love! I'm the one that booked the hotel room, and I'm the one who cancelled because these two imbeciles ruined the mood and atmosphere of what was to be the best night of our lives! I'm still not over it! Especially since this was so close to Valentine's Day. What else am I supposed to do? Just go on and pretend that nothing happened and that my favorite holiday wasn't completely destroyed?!_

Larxene

 _In a manner of speaking, Larxene…erm, yes._

Marluxia

 _I'm only one phone call away from both Roxas and Lea. Just so you know! ^_^_

Sora

 _Am I supposed to be scared of you, brat? What are you going to do to me anyway? I heard it through the grapevine that you're basically back on Keyblade training wheels ever since you epicly failed that exam. :)_

Larxene

 _Is that so, Larx? I had no idea. :P_

Marluxia

 _Hey, you try_ Inception _-ing yourself through dreamscapes and a world of Beethoven music and see if you don't get hypnotized! This wasn't a test where I picked A, B, C, or D, doi!_

Sora

 _Always pick C for everything, that's my motto!_

Riku

* * *

 **Everyman Keyman**

 **Sora**

Darn. Larxene was right, and that was one of the most disgusting things I've ever had to type. I am back on training wheels, technically. I don't have to go so far back in my training that I'm stuck with my old wooden sword—thank KH!—but yeah, I'm saddled with the Kingdom Key for the moment…which is basically the same thing. I feel like there's a conversation about feeling emasculated somewhere, but I don't feel like getting into it right now. It's been tough. At least I don't have to do the god-tier levels of training that Riku is doing at the moment (I like my sleep). It just sucks that I'm not alongside him taking on the real interesting challenges, you know?

Kairi cheered me up with a trip to the ice cream parlor today, though! I had mango ice cream, she had mocha with dark chocolate shavings. It was the best! I have a feeling we're going to be hanging out there the rest of the week. Oh well, training's not that hard, might as well load up on ice cream!

 **Comments:**

 _Heh-heh, yeah, training. I kinda forgot I did that. I haven't been showing up. Had more important things to do._

Axel

 _Axel, dude, I'm your sparring partner! Btw, Sora, thanks for the shout-out!_ _*kiss emoji*_

Kairi

 _*kiss emoji* + *five heart emojis* Love you too!_

Sora

 _Yeah, Princess, I hear ya. It just feels weird to be hanging out with the goody-goods for a change. It's like if the one guy from_ Breakfast Club _suddenly started going to a prep school instead._

Axel

 _Oh, that is crap, and you know it! :P_

Kairi

 _Yeah…That character wouldn't even last a day in prep school!_

Sora

 _Hey, man, I miss training with you, too. But, you're going to be moving up the ladder again in no time!_

Riku

 _True. I think in a couple days, I'm going to be upgrading to the Olympic Keyblade!_

Sora

 _That's the spirit!_

Riku

 _Olympic Keyblade? Um…how much does that one hurt?_

Larxene

 _According to my lexicon, it is on a pain scale of six owie-ows out of ten._

Zexion

 _Great…_

Larxene

* * *

 **Warrior Princess**

 **Kairi**

Another trip to the ice cream parlor with my love today! I know I should be a bit more disciplined at this point, considering I've been starting to go on longer and longer work-out regimens. But, when the nearest ice cream place is literally two blocks from your house, what else are you going to do, huh? Besides, Sora's doing pretty well himself as far as training goes—he's now upgraded to the Olympic Key, I'm so proud of him! We're going to be the most bad-a couple who've ever existed. Of course, once again, Square keeps me from cursing. Thanks. Double standards much, guys?

Oh, and I went through the chop this morning. I figure since I'm really focused on this not being a Mary Sue business as well as training and work-outs, I ought to have a more practical hairstyle. Might as well go back to my original hair. That and it was starting to hang in my eyes, it's almost always summer here, and it was just getting generally annoying for maintenance. So, if I look a little different to some of you, that's why. I couldn't be happier with the new (well, old, really, but you know) hair! ^_^

 **Comments:**

 _Aw! That's too bad. You looked really cute with long hair._

Selphie

 _It was getting really annoying, though! D: Besides, Selph, you got short hair, why are you judging me? Lol._

Kairi

 _Well…I can't pull off long hair like you can. I was living vicariously through you tbh!_

Selphie

 _Pfft, long hair's overrated anyway. It's just one more beauty standard that men would ideally want us to pull off, because it's so much more "pleasing" than short hair. As if! Let me live. :P_

Xion

 _Right? And besides, I know if I'd kept the longer hair, enemies would just end up trying to tug at it while I fought. I don't want that going on!_

Kairi

 _Why'd you change your blog title? Didn't it used to be "Don't Want to be a Mary Sue Idiot"?_

Namine

 _Yeah, but I was kind of overcompensating back then. I still don't want to be that, but I want to be defined more by what I am than what I'm not. ;)_

Kairi

 _That makes sense. Oh, btw, since you're my Other, does that mean I need to get short hair too? Because, um, no thank you, at least not for me._

Namine

 _No, Nam, you don't have to, lol! Besides, your hair is cute the way it is._

Kairi

 _I thought so! Thanks!_

Namine

 _Just make sure you remember to get it done every three weeks or so, that way you don't have to worry about it getting too long, especially in the back._

Xion

 _I love how this whole thread is just us talking about hair!_

Selphie

 _Well, it's very important to focus on hair care and basic hygiene. I think I know more than a few people who could actually read this and learn something!_

Olette

… _Is this an accusation?_

Xaldin

 _Ew, get out of here, this is girl talk!_

Xion

 _Yeah, Xaldin! Besides…I don't think there's much helping your weird dreads-and-sideburns situation. You're a lost cause, go back to the 80s._

Namine

 _This comment. Copying, pasting, framing it!_

Olette

* * *

 **A/N: I will never not get over Xaldin's hair tbh, it's almost too ridiculous, even by KH/FF standards!**

 **Oh, if only Kairi had gotten better writing throughout the franchise. Oh well, that's what fic is for, I guess, we can solve that issue.**

 **Updating...I will definitely aim for this weekend, though, of course, I'm pretty well caught up with uploading all the chapters I have so far. However, Ch. 10 is just now in the can in a timely fashion, and I hope I can get others thought-out, written-down, and edited in a similar fashion!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hey, all. Yeah, I've not been writing this as much as I would like, but when I do take the time, it's been fun! Besides, it's Valentine's Day and what better way to show my appreciation for the views, reviews, and faves then to update? Lately, I've been watching KH3 cutscenes on Youtube and just got through watching the Tangled stuff last night. I'd forgotten how much of a sass master Marluxia could be! I totally missed the Org. XIII characters, they're just so much fun to watch. I'm glad they found an excuse to bring them back. :)**

* * *

 **Chapter 10**

 **My Blog of Awesomeness**

 **Riku**

Hey, guys, I know I haven't updated in a while. Just didn't feel like flexing the old writing muscles (though I'm not adverse to flexing my normal ones ;) ). But, yep, I'm back. And, um, I don't know about some of you guys, but I got the script to KH3 in the mail today and…Let's just say, for some of it, I'm glad we're actors in a movie, kind of the same way the _Paranormal Activity_ people were where it blurs the line between real and fake, but you all know it's fake in the end. I don't know, there's one thing in this script that's really bugging me. I won't say what it is, though, because um, major spoilers. More importantly, I don't know how far along some of you are into it.

 **Comments:**

 _*sees script, skims it, and rips it up* Oh heck no! I'm playing by my rules here! At least after I shoot this and collect my paycheck because, um, there's no way I would do 99% of what I do here. SE doesn't like me, I guess. *shrugs*_

Kairi

 _Has SE ever liked you?_

Riku

 _Fair. I have been known to give them a hard time, that's why they keep giving me ship-shoddier lines. Dang it, I will curse again one day!_

Kairi

 _That's the spirit, Kai! Don't let the bastards get you down._

Xion

 _Oh, but you can curse, and it's fine. :P_

Kairi

 _It's a quote from_ The Handmaid's Tale! _Doesn't count if I'm just quoting something…lol, I guess. ^_^_

Xion

 _Um, I think I know what you're talking about, Riku. I don't like it either. Like, at all. You all would know why. *glares at sky* They're giving you the "overly opinionated actress" type of treatment, Kai, it's not right._

Sora

 _Hey, man look at it this way. Just be distracted by the Michael Bay explosions at the end, and we'll all go home to a niiice barbecue._

Riku

 _So, we're not really living in a bubble…Just a sort of KH: After Dark?_

Namine

 _Let's not overthink this. But, in a manner of speaking, I suppose, yes. None of this will make it into the Book of Canon anyway, which contains beautiful moments but also "We totally owned you lamers."_

Zexion

 _Hey, I thought that was a cool line!_

Seifer

 _You would. Hey, when's your buddy Rai updating? We miss him around these parts._

Riku

 _Soon. He's just gotta finish debugging his laptop._

Seifer

 _He can do that?_

Olette

 _Oh, just wait til he updates. You're all going to be shocked out of your seats!_

Seifer

 _Ooh, cool beans. And yeah, I should have never mentioned the bubble thing. Now, all our brains are hurting. I know mine is, oof!_

Xion

 _Ditto. -_-_

Axel

 _Oh, Axel, what's up? We're training tomorrow. I made us protein shakes!_

Kairi

 _Goody good gumdrops. :P_

Axel

 _Well, ahem, the wannabe writer under my "patronage" just put up another excerpt. I apologize in advance. *cringe*_

Xion

* * *

 **Aces High**

 **Luxord**

Welcome back, one and all! I have been attempting to work out the kinks to this manuscript, to varying degrees of success. I am going to be completely honest with you all: the urge to play blackjack has gotten stronger as a result. However, I will persevere! Surely, if I keep this up, a whole month will have gone by without once touching the cards, chips, or dice!

Today's words:

 _The crowd waited with bated breath for the joust to commence. Ladies already held out proffered handkerchiefs, ready to hurl the dainty doilies away at a moment's notice by way of a favor to their worthy knight. The men idly chatted, their voices loud with drink, as they clashed flagons of ale as a sign of good cheer. Just as the heat and impatience started to irk the intricately dressed spectators, the knights appeared with their chivalrous steeds, whose alabaster manes glowed in the sun. The horses stomped at the ground, nostrils flaring in impatience in anticipation for their time in the sun. King Reginald and his guest Lord Percival sat assuredly on their mounts, their eyes boring into each other by way of challenge. Only one of these noble men would be crowned victor today…_

 **Comments:**

 _Why'd you stop there? I wanted to read about the gore, dang it!_

Xaldin

 _I must confess the writer's block emerged at that moment. *sheepish grin emoji*_

Luxord

 _Chivalrous steeds? CHIVALROUS STEEDS?! Quit abusing the English language so casually, Luxord! The sheer violet of this prose is hurting my eyes…in a manner of speaking. :P_

Zexion

 _Oh, Zex, picky, picky. Shame that you can't recognize quality writing. Dude's got a sharp pen._

Xigbar

 _I'll advise him where to stick this so-called "sharp pen", if he keeps writing this dreck._

Zexion

 _Tsk, tsk, always a critic!_

Luxord

 _Not gonna lie, disappointed in this excerpt. I want to know more!_

Olette

 _This…I don't know what this is, but my offer as an editor is still on the table. I would suggest you weigh that considerably should you decide to go further. I can make this sound logical._

Saix

 _Yep, and everyone would fall asleep!_

Axel

* * *

 **WerewolfinLondon7** : *signs in* Hello, Lea.

 **Pyromania:** Uh…Look, I was just talking to Demyx about a DDR rematch and was gonna log off.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** ….*sigh* Please don't. I need to talk to you.

 **Pyromania** : Dude, what could we possibly have to talk about? You don't think I haven't forgotten when we were thrown into the Org. together? I didn't know what to do, I had no friends, and here you were joining the higher-ups and ditching me like the main kid's friends ditch him at the beginning of _Perks of Being a Wallflower_!

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** 0_0 What is that? Another reference to one of your absurd teen movies?

 **Pyromania:** Hey, watch it there, that movie got me emotional, OK? XP

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Be that as it may, do you think I would ever purposely abandon you when I was trying to get you to join my plot? Or have you conveniently forgotten that now that you have…new friends?

 **Pyromania** : Are you kidding me?! You're still on that? What you did hurt like hell.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** No more than some of your pranks have.

 **Pyromania:** Damn it, touché.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Let me get to the point before I log off. As much as this is going to hurt my pride like my hair being burnt, I just wanted to…say I am…sorry. For our petty arguments and misunderstandings. And the fact I never listened to you when you clearly needed someone to. I did fail you in that regard.

 **Pyromania:** Cool, you want a cookie for that? :P

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Ugh, Lea, I was being sincere. I NEVER apologize, you must give me some credit for that at least.

 **Pyromania** : Sure, but uh, you have a lot to make up for, man.

 **WerewolfinLondon7** : I know…I hope we can chat again soon.

* **WerewolfinLondon7** signs out*

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** *signs in* *looks at chat above* 0_0 Wow, man, how'd you get Saix to do THAT? He never acts like this.

 **Pyromania** : No idea, Roxas, no idea. I got a headache now.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS** : I know, me too! This is just weird… Did hell freeze over?

 **Pyromania:** If it did, I'll make sure you're the first to know. ;)

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** More important thing is, are you OK?

 **Pyromania** : Eh, I will be.

* * *

 **Days of One Who Loathes Everyone**

 **Saix**

This blog title might have to be changed. I cannot say that I hate everyone entirely these days…

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, wow, good, I was getting worried there. :P_

Xion

 _Fourteen, I don't say this idly. I realize there is no point to stoke flames of rage and bitterness toward those who do not deserve it._

Saix

 _Whoa, did you go to the same retreat as Don Draper? What is WITH you?!_

Xion

 _Believe it or not, I have always tried to maintain a sense of inner peace. It's just been so often troubled that I've faced some difficulty in the past._

Saix

 _Yep, someone's been into the New Age books._

Xigbar

 _Stuff and nonsense, Two. I have done no such thing!_

Saix

 _Well, I'd be interested in learning the new blog title. The current one has suited you so well._

Marluxia

 _Thank you, Eleven, that helps considerably. :P_

Saix

* * *

 **A/N: And, as per usual, the second chapter of the night is next!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: I know this chapter will look short next to the previous one but consider it a continuation of the same plotline, kind of!**

* * *

 **Chapter 11**

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

Ughhh, so I guess I started my training today. Literally everything hurts right now…The protein shakes weren't half-bad, though, so thanks for that, Kai. I just didn't think weight-lifting and kickboxing were necessary just to get some fancy Keyblade wielding moves. Ugh, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna lie back down again….

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, come on, it was only your first day! You'll get better!_

Kairi

 _You literally TKO'd me during boxing in the first 90 seconds, that's not off to a good start._

Axel

 _That's because you gotta commit outside of training times! Go for a jog instead of playing video games all day. And laying off the junk food helps, too._

Kairi

 _I feel attacked…_

Axel

 _Cutting off or even eating less junk food does wonders, believe me. Or, if you don't believe me, believe my muscles. :P_

Riku

 _I certainly believe both! ;) And Axe, it's OK if you suck at the gym. I can't even sprint, so you're already miles ahead of me! Heh._

Xion

 _Well…once I wake up, I'll let you all know if I feel any stronger. :P_

Axel

 _I think someone needs to get reacquainted with other food groups that aren't Chocolate, Chips, and Cheese Snacks. XP_

Namine

 _Hey, don't knock on cheese snacks! That's dairy, totally counts!_

Axel

 _I'm telling you, I grow fresh produce in my greenhouse all the time! No one listens to me, pah._

Marluxia

* * *

 **AntiAnybody14:** *signs in* OK, Saix, what's the deal? Is trying to get Axel to be your friend again another one of your sick manipulation tactics? Look, we know how you operate within the Org. We're not dumb.

 **WerewolfinLondon7** : I suppose he's told you two of our conversation already? -_-

 **AntiAnybody14:** Uh, duh! We don't keep secrets from each other anymore as a general rule. I'd just like to know if becoming friends again is your intention.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** If it was, I certainly wouldn't tell you.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Oh yeah, that's how a totally not guilty person talks. :P

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Very well then. Yes, it is true that I intend to make amends with Lea. Does my answer suffice?

 **AntiAnybody14:** Fine…But, I'm going to be real here. Axel—or I guess Lea—has been hurt before and by you specifically. We know this. If I find out you've hurt him again, you're going to wake up on the Twilight Town clock tower staring fourteen stories down while I'm holding you by your feet!

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** *signs in* And I'll throw your claymore out the window again!

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** ….Wait, that was you? I blamed Lea for that at the time, if I recall.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Well, me and Lea anyway. At the same time. But, next time, I'd throw it out a higher window!

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** All right, yes, I understand. Both of you have his best interests at heart, so I should tread carefully where his feelings are concerned. Or else I will apparently have horrible things happen to me.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Uh, they won't BE apparent if Lea tells us you upset him again. :P Besides, you weren't there when he was in bed for three days after you had that one intense conversation with him. We were. It sucked. We don't want something like that to happen to him again. Capiche?

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Understood, Xion.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Good! ^_^ Now, don't give me an excuse!

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Yeah, Blue Werewolf, don't! XD

* **AntiAnybody14** and **UWILLH8MYCAPS** sign off*

 **PatchydaRealPirate:** *signs in* Well, well, well, what was that about? Did you wake the tots up from their nap too soon? :D

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Hardly, Xigbar. They were merely putting a situation into perspective for me.

 **PatchydaRealPirate:** Huh. Never knew you to hang around the sandbox before…

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Please. I'm still the cool, aloof threat you have always known me to be.

 **PatchydaRealPirate:** Whatever you say, Wolfman, whatever you say!

* * *

 **Blinded Me with Science**

 **Vexen**

I must admit, these site updates took me much longer to familiarize myself with than I expected. Then again, continuing my blog has not been a priority as of late—I have just returned from the late 1800s with a patent I stole from Edison! Teach you to steal from your contemporaries, you overrated hack! Yes, where was I? Ah, contrary to Sora's warnings, I did go ahead and delve into this "shadowy" corner of the Internet out of scientific inquiry. And I must say, it is repulsive, even by my standards! I only meant to use the term "snowflake", because I thought I was being clever with referring to my ice powers. I had no idea it was used for more sinister purposes. And that is one hideous smug frog. Is that supposed to be their mascot? I'm no artist, but I can guarantee you all I can draw better than that! And I believe I have lots of spam in my email folder now, so I got to sort that out…

 **Comments:**

 _No comments_

*Two hours later*

 _Ah, I see this Rai fellow has put up a new post. I understand it's been highly anticipated. No wonder no one comments here. Attention-roving youths!_

Vexen

* * *

 **A/N: Annd those are the updates this week! I wanted to use this idea I had of Roxas and Xion sticking up for Axel in front of Saix to show that, even if Saix does want to be friends with him again, they're going to have their say on the matter, like it or not. I can't wait to stretch this arc out further.**

 **Well, this is been one tiring week for me. I can barely get creative with author's notes at all or even do much teasing of the next couple of chapters, that's how worn-out I am! I hope these chapters were good V-Day "gifts", if nothing else!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hey, guys! I know it's been a bit, but I've been busy/distracted with other things. Like the KH3 cutscenes, for instance. I'm about halfway through the playthrough I've been watching (well, more than half), and it's been a great watch! Those Org. XIII scenes especially really impress me with how much they've stepped it up with those characters' dialogue. That's been giving me life, especially Larxene, who I think has way better lines this time! I wonder if the writers have snooped around these parts for inspiration, though. One can't help but wonder...**

* * *

 **Chapter 12**

 **You Know**

 **Rai**

Look, guys, sorry you had to read whatever my old blog used to be. I was going to start posting here, but my little bro hacked me and trolled everyone, so everyone thought I was stupid! I don't make that many typing errors, I don't think. 'Sides, what dummy would think they were too good for Spell Check? Not me! I'm not a part of Seifer's crew for nothing—we're all smarter than we look! Fact is, I got some of the top test scores in my year. Ask any of my teachers, they'll tell you.

Anyway, that's what's been up with me.

 **Comments:**

 _This is the biggest twist since whatever M. Night movie it was with the dead people! 0_0 Wouldn't have guessed this._

Hayner

 _Some of the top test scores? I don't know how to feel about that…Well, I guess I'm smarter than your Internet troll little brother. That's something?_

Olette

 _Welp, never getting into a top college now._

Roxas

 _Let's be real, Roxas, that was never going to happen. :P_

Namine

 _Heeey!_

Roxas

 _There's always those schools online where you can pay for a degree, if you want!_

Xion

 _Those are scams, those wouldn't count! :/_

Roxas

 _Welp, didn't see this coming. Should have known it was a troll. It's impossible to be that off in spelling on the Internet._

Demyx

 _Whoa, your brother's the worst. What was he mad about?_

Pence

 _I told him to go away when he asked if he could hang with us. Disciplinary Committee's serious business, I don't want some 11-year-old kid cramping our style!_

Rai

 _Well, that was on you, wasn't it?_

Xion

 _He still shouldn't have pretended to be me! Now he's not allowed on the Internet for three months, cuz I told Mom and Dad. *smug smile emoji*_

Rai

 _This isn't what I expected, but that may be the coolest part. Welcome back, man!_

Riku

 _Told you all you'd be shocked. :P_

Seifer

* * *

 **Music is Life**

 **Demyx**

Well, I didn't think I would see THAT out of a Rai blog post. Guess I should have known, though—that old title was just wroooong.

Right. What have I been up to? Oh, you know, tinkering around with the sitar, trying to get some new songs going. You're probably not going to see them here like Luxord's drafts—dude's dedicated, I'll say that. I procrastinate so much that I get into blocks quite a bit, then I can't remember what I was trying to create. Life of an artist and all that.

Oh, but I DID finally beat Axel at DDR today! Then again, at least I don't have to worry about heavy-duty workouts at the gym and have the time to practice being good at it for once. And Xion, you really need to stop doing that thing with your arms. We're not at a rave. :P

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, come off it, Dem! I'll wave my arms however I want to wave them._

Xion

 _OK, suit yourself! ^_^_

Demyx

 _Gloat more, why don't ya? I managed to hold my own in the ring for two minutes longer than I did yesterday, so yay for progress!_

Axel

 _I saw you sneak those cookies into the gym, you cheating cheater! Protein shakes and water only! Oh, and maaaaaybe granola bars for the longer sessions._

Kairi

 _T_T How am I going to live with this? You seem sweet enough most of the time, but then you're a total dictator in the gym. I don't get it._

Axel

 _It's called being disciplined, Lea. Try it some time. ^_^_

Kairi

 _Can you wield your Keyblade any better?_

Demyx

 _Ironically, with all these work-outs, no. By the time we pick up the Keyblades to spar, I'm beat._

Axel

 _I won't resort to calling you a wimp BUUUUT…._

Kairi

 _Yeah, yeah, I know. I'll start jogging._

Axel

 _I feel like I'd be better at this whole work-out thing than you are, and I'm just hanging out with my sitar all day!_

Demyx

 _Yeah, good for you. :P Ow, my back…._

Axel

* * *

 **Subject: New Script Poll**

Hey, guys, I noticed there's this poll feature on the site no one's used before, so I thought I'd give it a spin. So, copies of the KH3 script got mailed to us here at the Castle That Never Was the other day, and I was just wondering what everyone thought of it. I've got some mixed feelings, personally.

 _What do you think of the KH3 script?_

 _It's nearly flawless in every way.—3%_

 _It's horse malarkey_!— _97%_

 **Posted by: Roxas**

 **Comments:**

 _Dang, people have some serious feelings about it, huh?_

Roxas

 _Horse malarkey x10!_

Xion

 _Co-signed._

Marluxia

 _I can't believe I have to read some of my dialogue, erghhh! How'd they manage to make me even more of a Sue?! How was that possible?_

Kairi

 _Because you've been a difficult actress since SE has known you, and they've had enough of your crap? That's what they say about me in the shadow room, apparently. I think they say that about all us girls, though. It's getting old._

Larxene

 _What are you all complaining about? At least the vast majority of you get to have lines. I don't have any at all!_

Xaldin

 _That's because no one was checking for you, my dude. Everyone knows you're not a fan favorite character out of all of us, unlike_ moi.

Xigbar

 _I don't mind the script, because at least I always get to play a pivotal role whenever I show up!_

Namine

 _Well, bully for you. *glares*_

Xaldin

 _I do like that I get to film on location with the Pirates crew again! That will be good fun._

Luxord

 _I have a direction that tells me to…to…smile in this. I do not recognize this melodramatic pile of tissue paper they call a script. And why can't I get a bloody raise?_

Zexion

 _Are you all not aware of what dreary behavior I have to put up with day in, day out? Of course you're looking for reasons to despise the script, thus the existence of this poll. There are not enough aspirins in the world to abide the other twelve of you, let alone our enemies._

Xemnas

 _Oh well, any pain to you is more fun for me, Xem-Xem!_

Xion

 _And you're not even an official member, you're only grouped in with us out of obligation!_

Xemnas

 _Yeah, yeah, tell me something I don't know. :P_

Xion

 _Tending to speak for the Superior, I must add that he too found great fault with the script. He takes particular displeasure with his resolution in this game/movie project._

Saix

 _Saix, why would you post this on a semi-public forum? It is evident I must lie down again…._

Xemnas

 _I will humbly accept my cameo appearance. I know I don't jump out as much compared to my peers. I am OK with this. :)_

Lexaeus

 _Glad to see someone's happy! Why even worry about this too much anyway? We film our parts, then we all go home and do whatever at the end of the day! It's not like this movie's going to dictate how we spend the rest of our lives, right?_

Demyx

 _Eh, you know, they probably need to give my stunt double a raise…just because I think I'm going to need him a lot, heh!_

Sora

 _What, I don't count?_

Roxas

 _You don't have the right hair, dude._

Sora

 _Oh, boooo! Actually, that's probably a good thing. I do have better hair than you. ;)_

Roxas

 _Hey, I just show up, be awesome, get paid, and go home. I don't see the big deal. Yeah, there're issues, but I'm a fire guy, not a script doctor!_

Axel

* * *

 **A/N: Actually, aside from the one big spoiler I've come across and heavily side-eyed, I haven't come across too many things that bother me about the KH3 cutscenes. In fact, there's been a lot of good moments I've seen so far i.e. Woody roasting Young Xehanort. I just think it's much funnier if these characters were whining about their "roles" than being happy about them. Makes for some interesting bickering that way.**

 **Next chapter will be up in two shakes!**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: And now, the inevitable holiday special type of chapter, one that I started back when it was actual Valentine's Day. And one that I've finished about an hour ago, heh.**

* * *

 **Chapter 13**

 **Years of Flowers**

 **Marluxia**

Today marks Valentine's Day, quite a marvelous occasion this year, if I do say so myself. If anyone wants to pick bouquets to give to a significant other or someone they admire, my greenhouse is at your disposal. It is fortuitous that I so happen to be in a generous mood today—I myself plan to go out with my darling Larxene to Traverse Town tonight and enjoy what we previously could not when we felt inclined. I will not name names, but they surely know who they are. You two ruffians will not disrupt our relationship so easily, I can assure you.

 **Comments:**

 _Aw, I'm so glad we're going to try this again, Marluxia! *heart emoji* I KNEW those idiots wouldn't keep us from our night._

Larxene

 _I would deign to point out that it was you who ultimately decided to postpone the evening….but I will not irk you on that front. I suppose I would have done the same thing had I been in your situation. :)_

Marluxia

 _Oh, we can take this to the hotel room and squabble there! Because, man, do I have responses for you._

Larxene

 _Ones that involve your quick tongue, perhaps? ;)_

Marluxia

 _Naturally…;)_

Larxene

 _Gaaaaaag!_

Roxas

 _Vom. *puking emoji*_

Axel

 _What do you two children know of love anyway? I don't see either of you including affectionate posts of your significant others on your blogs._

Marluxia

 _That's cuz Lette and I don't need to show off in front of all our friends about how in love we are! She thinks her bouquet gift will look more appealing if she's the only one looking at it and not, you know, ten randoms._

Roxas

 _Yeah, I don't need five paragraphs of Roxas telling me how great I am, and neither does he! We already know how awesome we are to each other. :)_

Olette

 _Look, I'm not looking for a relationship right now. And even if I was, I wouldn't rush into one these days because I was feeling some type of way. Um…sorry, Namine, if you see this._

Axel

 _No offense taken, Axel. I was guilty of rushing, too, lol._

Namine

 _Now that I think about it, though, you and Larxene do feel the need to show off what a power couple you are. It's getting boring._

Namine

 _BORING! Oh, really? I think we're the couple everyone would vote for at one of those silly high school dances where they crown certain couples for being the most interesting, popular, and good-looking. Marluxia and I are all three of those things, so you just shut your mouth!_

Larxene

 _Ooh, you told me. :P_

Namine

 _Ughhhhhhhh!_

Larxene

 _Larxene, don't worry about them. We ought to go ahead and start our Valentine's Day festivities. I plan for this to be a day-long celebration of our love, ma chere._

Marluxia

 _I like the sound of that, mon amour._

Larxene

 _Somebody give me a bucket to throw up in…_

Namine

 _Get in line! :D_

Axel

* * *

 **Tales of a Nobody Nothing**

 **Roxas**

OK, fine, if everyone is so curious about how well me and Lette's Valentine's Day is going, I guess I can give you all an inside look. We went to the movies to watch a special holiday rerelease of _When Harry Met Sally_ and then had some sea salt ice cream on top of the clock tower. But…now that I think about it, sometimes the occasional bragging post can do some good.

Olette is someone who just continues to surprise me. She's so sweet and attentive but also snarky as heck when she wants to be! Most of our fights always end with us laughing, because we realize how stupid we usually sound. And she's one of the smartest people I've ever met. I can't think of a better girl to end up being my girlfriend. See, I didn't need 5,000 words to tell all of you. Just meet her, and I think a lot of you would know what I'm talking about and how good I got it.

 **Comments:**

 _I gotta admit, this whole significant other validation thing IS kinda nice once in a while, hon. I love you!_

Olette

 _We might pretend to be edgy hipster teens who think we're above it all, but at the end of the day, we're total saps. *heart emoji*_

Roxas

 _*cocky grin emoji* Not so hard to heap praise on your beloved, now is it?_

Marluxia

 _Come on, man, get out of here! You're never on here._

Roxas

 _I had a point to prove, and now, Larxene owes me sixty munny. AFTER the holiday, of course, I wouldn't demand payment now. ;)_

Marluxia

 _Wow, you guys need to find better things to do… :P_

Roxas

 _Agreed. :P_

Olette

 _Aw, you guys continue being the cutest!_

Xion

 _Thank you! I think we are._

Olette

 _You two are obviously so perfect for each other. :)_

Namine

 _This is the pure content we get too little of on this site!_

Kairi

 _You're living the good life, Rox. :D_

Axel

* * *

 **Warrior Princess**

 **Kairi**

LOOKIE AT WHAT MY BOYFRIEND GOT ME!

*picture of a tropical orchid bouquet with a stuffed toy kitten holding a small box of chocolates is included*

 **Comments:**

 _Sorry, guys, heh. *sheepish smile emoji* I normally don't get over-the-top like that, but I mean, it's once a year, right?_

Kairi

 _I love you every day, though. One day is just the bare minimum. *heart emoji*_

Sora

 _D'awwwwwwww!_

Xion

 _Hey, where are they giving out buckets to throw up in? I hear they're popular today! :D_

Riku

 _Riku, you troll, you know we're perfect together. :P_

Kairi

 _Yeah, you love us being a couple. We bring you your daily dose of adorableness and cuteness! Where would you be without that?_

Sora

 _Eh, can't argue with you there!_

Riku

* * *

 **A Day in the Life**

 **Xion**

You know, normally, I think this holiday is a load of crap. But, there's always a first time for everything. This V-Day date tonight with Riku was really something else—then again, all our dates are that way! If I have to brag…We went and tried the new bistro in Twilight Town, and it was to die for! Prices were a little steep, but I think we can blame that on Scrooge trying to get every last cent out of people. The main thing, though, was that the food was lovely. I had eggplant parmesan while Riku had the spaghetti, and we even got to have a little bit of wine with our meal, which was great! The head chef really outdid himself tonight! A lot of happy couples in there.

I'm glad we had this nice time together. Valentine's Day should be every day, if we're strictly talking nice meals and exchanging compliments. I can do without all the other stuff.

 **Comments:**

 _Um, isn't that bistro's head chef a rat? That doesn't sound very hygienic to me, gross!_

Larxene

 _How have neither of you gotten food poisoning yet?_

Marluxia

 _Ugh, you two are sure clueless! FYI, rats actually keep themselves super clean. And the head chef could be a Dusk for all I care, as long as he keeps putting out great food!_

Xion

 _I can back up Number Fourteen's comment on rodent hygiene. I used to keep lab rats around myself, and they were very fastidious creatures._

Vexen

 _Oh sure, I'll totally believe whatever comes out of your idiot mouth, Vexen. :P_

Larxene

 _It's true!_

Vexen

 _And why should we trust your word on that? Whatever happened to these rats anyway?_

Marluxia

 _I, ah, might have lost them during my time travels…If you're accusing me of being a cruel pet owner, Marluxia, I'll have you know that that is rich coming from someone who couldn't even be trusted to take care of a cactus!_

Vexen

 _It was your cactus, of course I was going to let it die, you fool!_

Marluxia

 _Let's take this to IM! I'm sitting up for this!_

Larxene

 _*sigh* Happy Valentine's Day, Xion. You might have these pea-brains to deal with, but let's be honest here, that makes my life even more interesting._

Riku

 _Well, love, my non-life feels so much closer to an actual life with you in it. ;)_

Xion

 _Aw. You're too much sometimes. :)_

Riku

 _I know. But, where would we be if I wasn't?_

Xion

* * *

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

So, uh, kind of a weird day for me. The holiday brought up some baggage for me, thinking about if breaking up with Namine was a good call, and then on top of THAT, I found this rose outside my door this morning. It's white, so I guess I can say it matches the interior of my room well enough, heh! The weirdest thing about getting it was that there wasn't even a note attached to it. So, what, do I just have to keep guessing on who would send me one?

 **Comments:**

 _OK, so first of all, I would be telling you to get a grip and move on with that issue if I didn't still care about you too much not to be mean. More importantly, sounds like you might have an admirer, Lea!_

Namine

 _Eh, what now? Who?_

Axel

 _Who knows? They obviously want to stay a secret for now!_

Namine

 _Oh, great…_

Axel

 _Hm, a white rose? Interesting… So, on the surface, that obviously represents innocence and purity. Neither of which you are, so I don't know what this individual was thinking. However, that particular color of rose also symbolizes a fresh start. Whoever this person is clearly wants another chance with you after squandering a previous one. That and they admire you, which is most unfortunate…for them. :P_

Marluxia

 _Thank you, Flower Boy as always, for the insightful commentary. :P Well, whoever this person is must have picked it from YOUR greenhouse, right? Do you have any ideas?_

Axel

 _I think I might…But, I'm not at liberty to reveal that just now. You're smarter than you look and act, I'm sure you can figure it out._

Marluxia

 _*singsong* Someone's got a crush on Lea, someone's got a crush on Lea!_

Xion

 _Man, my life just keeps getting more and more confusing!_

Axel

* * *

 **A/N: Honestly, I think those Org. XIII KH3 scenes have given me quite a bit of inspiration, considering how much snarkier I felt like making everybody this chapter! Ah, well, I hope you enjoy reading that as much as I enjoy writing it.**

 **Til next time!**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N:** Hey, guys! Well, as inconsistent as I've been in terms of which day to actually upload on, here are the next two chapters. I've been slow in watching all the KH3 cutscenes, because I want to savor them, but I think I'm almost done. They've really tapped into my emotions.

Tonight, an argument over a cactus to start.

* * *

 **Chapter 14**

 **IceIceBaby:** *signs in* Larxene had an excellent point. We are nowhere near finished in discussing the fate of my cactus!

 **Roses4Life:** …..How do I even dignify any of that with a response? First off, this so-called incident you speak of happened six months ago. Secondly, I don't see how you would assign so much personal value and attachment to a plant when you carelessly lost your rats (which I would think you would be MORE upset about). And thirdly, it was an unsightly thing. No flower buds or anything. I was genuinely doing you a favor in letting it die.

 **IceIceBaby:** I trusted you to take care of it while I was off in Renaissance Italy trying to pick da Vinci's brains! Last I checked, you controlled plants. There is no real excuse for you to have let Nikolai die!

 **ElectricLady12:** ROFLMAO! Nikolai?! Oh, this is too good!

 **Roses4Life:** You also forget, Vexen, that I control death as well. My scythe isn't mere decoration. If I want something to die, I can make that come to fruition. And look stylish while doing so, of course. ;)

 **ElectricLady12:** You tell him, babe!

 **IceIceBaby:** Yes, yes, I'm well-aware of your attention to "style". It's the principle of the thing, Marluxia. I was only gone for two days. If you hated looking at it so much, you ought to have entrusted it to another member.

 **Roses4Life:** But, have you forgotten? I. Don't. Like. You. :)

 **ElectricLady12:** Ooh, buuuuuurn!

 **IceIceBaby:** Do have anything to add aside from cheering on your boyfriend, Larxene?

 **ElectricLady12:** No, not really….It was a rather disgusting-looking cactus, though. :P

 **Illusionist6** : *signs in* Normally, I would be reading or practicing dark magic instead of pointlessly chatting on here, but I now find myself in the unenviable position of needing to defend Vexen. Or, at the very least, refereeing this little charade.

 **Roses4Life:** Zexion…Your first time in a chatroom, I suppose?

 **Illusionist6:** Yes, grudgingly. And Marluxia, Vexen was correct when he pointed out that you could have left the care of Nikolai to another member. I would have volunteered.

 **IceIceBaby:** My comrade in science! Thank you! Take that, you two!

 **ElectricLady12:** Great, Zexion's here, this will get dull! *signs out*

 **Illusionist6:** Now, Vexen, that's not to say you're completely in the right either. Six months have passed since the incident, and you're choosing this time to get angry over it? Move on. There will be other cacti to name Nikolai in the future, I'm sure.

 **ElectricLady12:** *signs in* Ha, see?! You heard the kid, get over it, Vex! *signs out*

 **IceIceBaby:** You have a valid point, I suppose…

 **Illusionist6** : Good. Can we all make amends and be somewhat close to friends?

 **Roses4Life:** "Friends"? Don't make me laugh. Seriously, don't, I've done so much of it already today. :P

 **Illusionist6:** Tentative allies then?

 **Roses4Life:** Very well.

 **IceIceBaby:** Fine…

 **Illusionist6:** Good. If you gentlemen would excuse me, I got an Ouija board to dabble with. *signs out*

 **IceIceBaby:** I'm not sure if Zexion and IMing mix very well.

 **Roses4Life:** You're telling me. What a very dull conversationalist.

 **IceIceBaby:** Wait, why are we still talking? I hate you!

 **Roses4Life:** Likewise. -_-

*Both **Roses4Life** and **IceIceBab** y sign out*

* * *

 **Diary of an Artist**

 **Namine**

Maybe it's because I get a great view of the sky living out on Destiny Islands, but I've been really into stars and constellations lately. And from there—I know some of you will groan at this—I'm now _obsessed_ with the zodiac and horoscopes. I'm more of a monthly horoscope girl myself. The daily ones are a bit sketchy, because I doubt the stars could accurately predict what can go on in my life from day to day. Anyway, I guess this is a lead-in to ask you all in the comments what your sign is. Mine is Pisces. :)

 **Comments:**

 _I think I'm…Sagittarius? Maybe? That's most December birthdays, right?_

Xion

 _Yeah, Xion, that's right! Oh, that's cool. That explains why you're so adventurous._

Namine

 _Leo! I knew I had fun being a lion in Pride Lands!_

Sora

 _Gemini. :P_

Xigbar

 _Why am I not surprised? :P_

Namine

 _What? What's wrong with being a Gemini?_

Xigbar

 _Everything. But, if I'm being specific, you're all literally two-faced. *cymbal tap*_

Xion

 _Oh come on! When have I ever given the impression that I'm two-faced?_

Xigbar

 _All the time!_

Axel

 _Every single day._

Xaldin

 _You're always looking for the latest gossip to turn around and share to the gossip's subjects. It's how I found out about this whole Roxas and Axel vs. Marluxia and Larxene thing a while back._

Demyx

 _I love my sign! I'm Scorpio. ;)_

Larxene

 _Shocker of the century! :P_

Xion

 _Yeah, aren't they supposed to be sociopaths or something? No offense, heh._

Sora

 _We all get that rap! I wish people would stop saying that…_

Larxene

 _And I heard Scorpios and Cancers are a suitable match. It explains us, darling. ;)_

Marluxia

 _You are a cancer. -_- Accurate sign is accurate._

Namine

 _I already told you that you stand up for yourself far too much online, right?_

Marluxia

 _See comment above yours again. :P_

Namine

 _I think I'm Libra. Pretty sure._

Kairi

 _And, upon advising my lexicon, I know for certain that I am an Aquarius. If I even took stock in such nonsense._

Zexion

 _Spoken like a true Aquarius then. :P_

Xion

 _I know people are going to be surprised with this, but I'm Aries. :P_

Axel

 _Ahhh, fire sign, I get it. So, I'm the only water sign of me, you, and Xion, I guess. I'm a Pisces too, like Namine. :)_

Roxas

 _Oh, no wonder you're the calmest one out of all of us. :P_

Xion

 _Nah, I'm just better at keeping my temper. :P_

Roxas

 _Hey, I'm a Libra too, wouldn't you know it? Is that a good thing? I'm not typically up on this kind of stuff._

Riku

 _Oh totally. ;)_

Xion

… _.Virgo._

Saix

 _The really serious, studious one. Checks out!_

Namine

 _Hahaha, as in Virgo the Virgin?_

Xigbar

 _Let's not even start that line of conversation, Two. -_-_

Saix

 _Yeah, come on, dude, grow up!_

Xion

 _Gonna have to agree with Xi that that was out-of-line, man. :P_

Axel

 _Wait, don't you two hate him? *thinking face emoji*_

Xigbar

 _Nah, I've upgraded my hatred of him to light dislike. ;)_

Xion

 _I'm…flattered?_

Saix

 _Same as Xion. Throw in some wariness for good measure._

Axel

 _To be lightly disliked is better than being fully despised, I suppose._

Saix

 _Ehm, if this is still going, I'm Pisces, too!_

Demyx

 _Sure a lot of fellow Pisces' here! We're the best, not gonna lie._

Namine

 _Heck yeah, high five!_

Demyx

 _Capricorn._

Xemnas

 _Ew._

Larxene

 _Ditto._

Marluxia

 _Yeah, everyone seems to think Gems are bad, but Caps are a trip and a half, dude._

Xigbar

 _Aw, they're not that bad! I'm one, too._

Vexen

 _Not helping the Cap cause, Vex. Although I don't mind them myself, just as long as their ambition doesn't swallow up everyone in their path._

Xion

 _You're weirdly into astrology too, Xion, lol._

Kairi

 _What can I say? It's fun! ^_^_

Xion

 _Taurus. I do control the earth for a reason._

Lexaeus

 _Aquarius._

Xaldin

 _And I'm a Leo, too. I do have a flair for ego and dramatics, after all!_

Luxord

 _So that's everyone in the Organization accounted for at least. What an interesting collection of signs! No wonder I couldn't stand to live with you guys after a while. No one agrees with each other on anything!_

Namine

 _Nam, I think that's just because it's…the Organization, lol!_

Riku

 _True facts._

Axel

 _Now which Hogwarts houses would we be?_

Sora

 _Are you kidding? Everyone would have to take the test, copy and paste their results, then crap on each other's house for ten comments' pages, lol. It's not worth it, at least not today. *For the record, I'm definitely a Hufflepuff*_

Kairi

* * *

 **Divining by Moonlight**

 **Saix**

I never thought I would see so many of us convene on a post about astrology. I would ask whether or not we would be so silly, but who am I to judge? I do consult the stars every night, after all, on all matters of things.

 **Comments:**

 _Like?_

Axel

 _*sigh* A great number of things. I will not air out all my innermost thoughts on my blog._

Saix

 _Then why have one? :D_

Axel

 _Well, I usually record major happenings in further detail. When something happens of note, you will be the first to know. :P_

Saix

 _The smirky face tells me otherwise. Are you using sarcasm on me, man? *laughing emoji*_

Axel

 _Oh forget it…_

Saix

* * *

 **A/N:** OK, I'm a Scorpio myself, so I feel like it's OK for me to make those jokes. XD And I wouldn't judge anyone by zodiac sign, of course. I just wanted to pick a random topic for them to bicker about and you can't get much more random than astrology! I do find it odd that, unlike FFVII, these characters don't have assigned bdays, but that could be b/c they don't go by a traditional system of months. I mean, the official KH timeline is already confusing enough as it is...


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

 **Warrior Princess**

 **Kairi**

It took a while, but I think Lea is finally getting with the program as far as our training goes! He did so well today. We just went through all the regular exercises like lifting, running, and spinning in what felt like no time at all, AND we managed to have a successful sparring match with our Keyblades. Or mildly successful anyway. I know physical changes don't happen overnight as far as exercise improvements go. But, I'm more than happy to give credit where it's due. I'd even say Lea is a rock star in the gym now. XD

Oh, I've gotten questions about what I put in my "protein" shakes. Here's the recipe I typically use:

1 ½ cups coconut milk

1 cup fresh spinach

1/2 cup of almonds

1 ½ cups mango, diced and frozen (obvs. thaw first)

1 ½ cups pineapple, diced and frozen (same as above)

 **Comments:**

 _Good job, Lea!_

Xion

 _Glad to hear you've been killing it lately! Way to go, woooot!_

Roxas

 _Yeah, yeah, but I can't take all the credit for it, you know. I owe a lot to Kairi for really cracking down on me in the gym and whipping up those protein shakes that I kinda hate, kinda love at the same time. I'd throw in some sea salt, personally._

Axel

 _Oh, gross, why would you ruin them like that? :P_

Kairi

 _What can I say? I just think sea salt makes some great flavoring for stuff. But, I may be biased. Everything's better with sea salt, right, guys?_

Axel

 _Um…sure, but I don't know about shakes._

Xion

 _Eh…_

Roxas

 _These shakes sound great, Kai! I think I'll make some myself before my sessions with Riku._

Sora

 _Yay! Be careful about getting gung-ho, though. I only whip them up twice a week. Not to mention water is first priority!_

Kairi

 _Just don't break the blender. :P_

Riku

 _What? Come on, dude, I might not be "on" all the time, but I'm not that stupid. :P_

Sora

 _Congratulations on your progress._

Saix

 _0_o And hello to you too, Saix. You certainly don't pop up over this part of the site too often…_

Kairi

 _I like to give credit to those when it's due, as you said._

Saix

 _Cool…_

Kairi

 _He's actually pretty chill these days, Kairi. I wouldn't worry about him much. :)_

Xion

 _He just better not try anything!_

Riku

 _Exactly, love._

Xion

* * *

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** *signs in* It seems you have been faring well in your training regimen, Lea. But…Since when did you wield a Keyblade?

 **Pyromania:** Wow, aren't you usually the observant one? I've been able to summon one for a few months now! I think I have a real knack for using it. :P

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Well, when one tends to stick close to a specific clique of Nobodies, one tends to miss things.

 **Pyromania:** Oh yeah, your clique. So, Xemnas, Xigbar, and Xaldin, right?

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Throw in Luxord as well, but otherwise, yes, you're correct.

 **Pyromania:** Yeah. Right. Those guys. You been hanging around them lately?

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Not as much as I used to….

 **Pyromania:** What, they kick you out? Sorry about that.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Actually, no. I just…choose to occupy my time alone these days. I have found their company more tiresome, and sometimes, I would much rather stand out on the observation deck and study the moon.

 **Pyromania:** Huh. You don't even hang with Xemnas?

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Are you joking? ESPECIALLY not Xemnas. If truth be told, he just may well be the biggest bore of them all. Not to mention his insistence on talking about himself constantly as well as plotting. If I'm to be the lapdog, so to speak, it is for "survival" reasons only. Otherwise, he would probably hound me as much as he does you three.

 **Pyromania:** Highly doubt that, man. You're actually sane compared to the shenanigans me and the little terrors get up to, haha! XP

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Sane? Far from it on certain days, I think. You mean to imply that you appreciate that about me?

 **Pyromania:** Sure! Someone's gotta keep the ship on the course, right? But, you don't have to say anything nice about me, though, heh. I know that's not your style.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Quite the contrary, if I have to pick a quality I like about you, it would be your boldness. You always were so much braver than me, rushing into things and ready to improvise.

 **Pyromania:** o_0 I have to say, I was not expecting that.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Nor was I, but when pressed, I can be forthcoming.

 **Pyromania:** Huh. You finally got me to shut up, because I got nothing.

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** A none too easy feat, usually. :)

 **Pyromania:** Hey, did you just…tell a joke?

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Oh, come now, Lea, surely, you're not so dense!

 **Pyromania:** Ha, I knew it! You actually told a joke! :D I oughta screenshot that and show to Rox and Xi!

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** I'd rather you didn't…

 **Pyromania:** Oh, well! Heh, anyway….Good talk, Isa. *signs out*

 **WerewolfinLondon7:** Hm…That would be the second time you've called me that recently. *signs out*

* * *

 **Subject: In Pressing Need of a Grocery Store Trip**

Attention, Org. XIII members. It has come to my attention that there will be a passing storm of Heartless that will likely force us to stay inside for a few days until it moves on. As your leader, being my duty to keep vigilant on such matters, I must insist that we stock up on provisions. Tomorrow, we will go to the Grocery Store That Never Was and try to stay within a 5,000 munny budget for the thirteen—right, fourteen—of us. Please choose only the most necessary of items. NO JUNK FOOD. AND NO LUXURIES SUCH AS BUBBLE BATH SOAP. Understand that we ought to practice sensible shopping methods.

 **Posted by: Xemnas**

 **Comments:**

 _No bubble bath soap? Hmph! Looks like Xemnas doesn't want us to have any fun or relaxation time._

Larxene

 _Is that truly surprising? :P I could use a new set of gardening gloves, but I suppose that would be considered a "luxury" as well._

Marluxia

 _Grocery Store That Never Was? Don't mean to hijack the post, but why is it called that?_

Sora

 _Oh, easy! Basically, Sora, names of places aren't that creative here. Our address is technically the Castle That Never Was at the World That Never Was. So, everywhere around us just has "That Never Was" tacked on at the end. Grocery Store That Never Was, Bar That Never Was, Ice Cream Place That Never Was, etc._

Roxas

 _That sounds…kinda lame, though!_

Sora

 _Now you know how we feel! Everything must be put in acronym form when written down to ease the complication of it all._

Luxord

 _No junk food. OK. Sure. Cool._

Axel

 _Axel, do not weigh us down with that crap like you did last time!_

Xaldin

 _Definitely was not thinking that. Nope._

Axel

 _This could get…interesting. We haven't gone in two months, so we're almost out of everything right now._

Demyx

 _And given that it's a Heartless storm on the horizon, I have a feeling we're going to run into other shoppers. Many of them, in fact._

Zexion

 _Let the Running of the Storm Panickers commence!_

Xion

 _Indeed, yes. Bring it on!_

Luxord

* * *

 **A/N: Oh yes, from working retail, don't I know a thing or two about weather-related rushes. :P And I've really enjoyed fleshing out the Axel/Saix, Lea/Isa dynamic here. I never would have thought they'd become one of my favorite individual friendships throughout the series, but hey, I guess that's what happens when they expand on Saix's backstory. I do love a hot/cold balance, too.**

 **EDIT 3/4/19: Now edited to flesh out the "protein shake" conversation a tad, since it's come to my attention that I might have gone through that part of the chapter too quickly. Also, you can prob. tell I don't go to a gym regularly, but even I know that protein powder's not great (also wouldn't make sense for it to exist in this universe anyway tbh!). This is what I get for Googling "tropical shake" and finding the first recipe available. I'll admit I rushed through updating last night b/c I wanted to watch more KH3 cutscenes. My bad! XD**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Guys, I kinda hate to admit it, but I ran into a bit of a lack of motivation in writing more than I did this week! I blame it on the more recent weather here in my lovely corner of Midwest that dealt with more snow and cold early in the week. That was not fun. :/ On the upside (well, kinda upside), I did FINALLY finish watching the KH3 cutscenes. I'll admit, the story was kinda flawed, I thought, but I loved so many of the character interactions that I had a positive experience watching overall! I don't know if I've completely recovered from the intense emotions yet, though. XP**

* * *

 **Chapter 16**

 **ReggaeBrit3** : *signs in* So, gentlemen, any ideas on what to purchase tomorrow?

 **PatchydaRealPirate** : Eh, probably some soy sauce. Some fish for sushi. Boss man said no junk food, so that takes a lot of my enthusiasm away for this trip, to be honest. What, we're not allowed to snack after missions? Not even Cheeze-Its? I gotta say, that's kind of a bummer.

 **Fate'sGambler10** : I'm sure you'll survive, Xigbar. After all, there are always times to shop when we're not altogether, collectively under Xemnas' thumb.

 **PatchydaRealPirate:** True enough! And it's not like the man himself doesn't have a stash of chocolate snack cakes hiding around somewhere. Surely, the man's got his vices as much as we do. :P

 **ReggaeBrit3:** Any bright ideas, Luxord?

 **Fate'sGambler10:** Hmmm…Perhaps bottled vegetable smoothies to keep up our strength? Salad mixes?

 **Roses4Life:** *signs in* …At this point, I give up on mentioning my fresh produce. That I grow and pick in my greenhouse. For free.

 **Fate'sGambler10:** No offense, Marluxia, but we don't trust you enough to eat anything you provide. Lest you try to poison all of us.

 **Roses4Life:** Now why would I do that? I'm vegan. *glares* I don't put any additives in my food.

 **ReggaeBrit3:** Are you a non-caffeine guy, too?

 **Roses4Life:** I like a good, healthy diet to maintain my youthful appearance as long as I can. But, I'm not delusional. I can't survive without caffeine!

 **PatchydaRealPirate:** Well, one could make the argument that caffeine IS an additive, even if it's "naturally occurring" or whatever mumbo-jumbo like that.

 **Roses4Life:** True enough, but I mainly drink herbal tea. And I like my coffee without any sugar.

 **Fate'sGambler10:** Coffee without sugar? *gasp* You monster! :P

 **ReggaeBrit3** : All right, I'll add coffee to the list, speaking of which. We've been completely out of that for a few days.

 **WerewolfinLondon7** : *signs in* I'd also want almond milk creamer. *signs out*

 **PatchydaRealPirate** : Wouldn't that be considered a "luxury" item, though?

 **Roses4Life** : Bah, who cares? Saix has the right idea—that sounds delicious!

 **ReggaeBrit3** : Well, thank you all for the ideas! Now, hopefully, our grocery store trip will go as smoothly as possible, imminent Heartless storm not withstanding.

* * *

 **A Day in the Life**

 **Xion**

Woo-hoo, I never realized how fun grocery shopping is! Why does everyone else act like it's such a terrible thing? Especially when we're all together like this, like it's a field trip! Except it's all about food. ^_^ I don't know why we split up and tend to go in smaller groups most of the rest of the time. We should totally go in one large group all the time, makes me feel like I'm part of a family! I'm actually live-blogging this from the deli, and we (well, "we" meaning me, Roxas, and Axel) all thought we'd take a bit of a break while we chowed down on some fresh hot chicken wings in this little cafeteria here. Wow, this store is massive! I can see Zexion blasting a dark energy ball at Marluxia to make his cart tip over. Oooh, Marly's ticked, he's got his scythe out and chasing him around, getting out of all the other Nobodies' way. I didn't know there were any ones other than us, but yeah, they are not happy. Oh-ho, Marly only got a hold of one of Zexy's illusions. Better luck next time!

 **Comments:**

 _Will you stop live-blogging my troubles like they're spectator sports?! Besides, what are you all doing over in the deli anyway? We're only going to get what we need for a simple in/out trip. Instead, you're blowing munny on…on…FRIED DAMN CHICKEN?!_

Marluxia

 _It's good, you're missing out, man!_

Axel

 _I'M. VEGAN!_

Marluxia

 _Gesundheit. :P_

Roxas

 _Uh, guys, he's coming this way. 0_0 We better get back to our cart!_

Xion

* * *

 **I'm Crazy Evil**

 **Larxene**

I got soothing bubble bath soap that's lavender scented. Buh-bye, 10 munny, I regret nothing!

 **Comments:**

 _Why do I get the feeling that live-blogging shopping exploits will completely backfire on those who are doing so?_

Saix

 _I'm actually kind of bored at the moment, Wolfie. I already got what I wanted…and I see a make-up section! Hm, I could always use more peach lip gloss. :P_

Larxene

 _You haven't made those purchases yet, I trust, 12? You are already pushing things with one luxury item. I hope this warning discourages you from buying anything from the cosmetics section._

Xemnas

 _Ugh, don't make me roll my eyes! I just want to look my best. Something most of you (except for my beloved, of course!) oblivious men would never understand._

Larxene

 _*hides hair gel* Ahem-hem, not true!_

Demyx

 _:P Do I have to spell it out, Demyx? I'm saying my boyfriend out-styles ALL of you._

Larxene

 _Yes, well, can you tell him not to keep making my as-yet unpurchased Stephen King book disappear? That would be most thoughtful. *exasperated emoji*_

Zexion

* * *

 **A/N: Doesn't matter the title, a general rule of thumb is always expect a Stephen King book in a grocery store! I am debating whether or not I want to buy a copy of Pet Semetary at mine, but hm, I'm on a self-imposed book-buying ban at the moment so maybe not. XD And I went a little unorthodox in having "live-blogging" at a store, but I was trying to think of some way to incorporate the Org.'s parody zaniness while doing even a simple thing like grocery shopping. Also, as of KH3, I guess we can say smartphones in-universe are now canon. XP**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Yes, I'll admit that these installments do feel short, but I'm thinking a couple more chapters of this to make this a bit of a mini-arc of the Org.'s grocery trip gone awry. Because why not? And I work at a store myself and need to vent a bit. XP**

* * *

 **Chapter 17**

 **I'm More British than U**

 **Xaldin**

I regret to inform those of you within my social circle that the last good yellowfin tuna may or may not have been taken by Zexion and Lexaeus. Because I am not finding any other package that looks nearly as good. Also, I got knocked down by a swarm of overzealous Nobodies over in Aisle 9. This shopping business is getting more than a little intense for my liking.

 **Comments:**

 _That's OK, man, we can always use crab or lobster or something. Don't have to necessarily make sushi out of it, just something to make a nice meal. I don't care either way. *shrugs*_

Xigbar

 _Idiot…Don't you realize how bloody expensive lobster is?! We do have a budget to mind, after all._

Xaldin

 _We might be going over it…There was a new fresh pack of Uno cards calling my name over at the recreation section. *sheepish grin emoji*_

Luxord

 _Uno? UNO?!_

Xaldin

 _I'll put it back….*sigh* I should just go back to some more writing, but the cards are as tempting as always._

Luxord

* * *

 **Mastering Illusions, Telling People off 24/7**

 **Zexion**

This is why I never leave the castle…While I'll admit, out of the three of us (Lexaeus, Vexen, and myself), I am the one most inclined toward these day-to-day activities, I do not ask to be bullied while I'm shopping! I had an insistent humanoid Nobody knock me out of the way with a baby seat over by the bread aisle, only to find that she was carrying a Dusk inside it! And I thought we were manipulative. Somehow, these non-Organization members are worse, and I never knew anyone with the hitherto unique situation like us existed. I suppose The World that Never Was is a place to live for ALL Nobodies, but why must they all be so rude? If I encounter this behavior in the dairy aisle, I will declare an all-out war.

Bad enough that Marluxia keeps warping away my book so that we can "stay within the budget", he says. Meanwhile, I spy with my sharp eye the host of hair products he has stowed in the cart. I certainly hope Larxene will have room for her groceries amidst all that rubbish.

 **Comments:**

 _Not rubbish. I put effort into my appearance. Meantime, you tend to wear a hairstyle that will surely be outdated in a few years' time, if not already. Now, I won't say this again. Do not. Get. The. Book._

Marluxia

 _I kept that in mind…One of my illusions just purchased it for me and is waiting outside the store as we speak._

Zexion

 _You…!_

Marluxia

 _Find another one of us in the Org. to bother, Marluxia. Besides, you are not the Superior, as much as you like to pretend you're him when we're all out shopping like this. :P_

Zexion

 _We'll deal with your insolence later!_

Marluxia

 _Tell him!_

Larxene

 _Oh, I am quite frightened. :P_

Zexion

 _We may be almost done already, Zexion. Vexen and I will meet you over in frozen, so we can pick out a decent package of frozen shrimp._

Lexaeus

 _Yes! We must fix an excellent shrimp cocktail soon!_

Vexen

* * *

 **Tales of a Nobody Nothing**

 **Roxas**

Uh, we may or may not have 200 munny's worth of junk food in our cart right now. Consider this a failed mission. And if I'm being real here, I think we got at least six packages of pizza rolls alone, from the looks of it. Like not even small boxes, pretty good-sized bags….

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, that'll be EASY to rectify. I'll just warp all those cakes and cookies away from your cart. And the pizza rolls too, of course!_

Xaldin

 _I'll help. :)_

Marluxia

 _Well…Well…we'll just beat you to the checkout!_

Roxas

 _Yeah!_

Xion

 _Besides, I'd like to see anyone in this Org. try that. 'Sides, isn't it against this store's policy to not warp items away from other shoppers, since it's considered disruptive?_

Axel

 _Also, it would cause massive "shrink", meaning many of those things won't be easy to replace if you dump one's groceries into an alternate dimension. Or, in my case, multiple copies of the same book. :P_

Zexion

 _Yes, an offense that is worthy of being banned from the store for life, if I understand correctly. Especially if repeated._

Saix

 _Why do you guys have to be such mood killers? *glares*_

Larxene

 _Yes, we must do everything to ensure we remain within budget, you fools!_

Marluxia

 _There's a way to do that and not be a pompous, overly controlling ass, 11._

Saix

 _WHOA, what now?! What. Now?!_

Roxas

 _I apparently missed the memo on Saix now going to bat for dimwitted pipsqueaks! Ugh, forget it, Marluxia. I don't wanna get banned…_

Larxene

 _I don't either…This store does have great hair products I couldn't find anywhere else, I must admit._

Marluxia

* * *

 **A/N: I just can somehow see Marluxia going on a (granted, very hypocritical) power trip while shopping or, really, just wherever he can get it. Also, he's actually one of my faves, so any excuse to include him in these chapters is always fun. Did not expect to have Saix of all people to call him out (and I wrote it, I know, but hey), then again, I'm trying to further his arc in making up with the Sea Salt Trio here.**

 **Til next time! Oh, and maybe check out Captain Marvel-I know I certainly enjoyed it this weekend!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Hey, guys! You have no idea how happy I am to get over this delay, almost as happy as you probably are. So, early last week, I thought I was going through some lack of motivation/writer's block...And I kind of was, with being busy and everything, but then it turned out I was also sick with the flu! Yeah, not fun. I'm now more than quite over it, and for that, I'm relieved. So, with that, enjoy more grocery shopping shenanigans!**

* * *

 **Chapter 18**

 **Divining by Moonlight**

 **Saix**

I am only making this "live" post for one reason and one reason only: as a means to mentally go over what I plan to bring to checkout. I believe I have all the staples: almond milk (as opposed to regular cows' milk, I could never abide the stuff!), dark roast black coffee, gluten-free multigrain bread, and eggs for omelets. Also have some produce for breakfast as well as for some dinner ideas I've spotted on Pinterest…Let's see, nuts for salad toppings as well as regular snack. A few packages of chicken and ground turkey. Almond milk creamer. And lastly, jerky. One can never have enough jerky. That may be classified as a luxury item, but Superior, considering how much hair product Marluxia has in his possession…Perhaps you will understand that, compared to him, I'm much more frugal.

 **Comments:**

 _Sensible, healthy stuff…Bor-ing!_

Axel

 _You still eat like a child, Axel. I fail to see your need to condescend to me on matters of nutrition when I'm fairly certain I saw twelve different kinds of cheese in your shared cart. *glares*_

Saix

 _Hey, man, just joking! That's actually quite the selection you have there. You really do make me look bad, heh._

Axel

 _Well…then just as well. That was my intention. :p_

Saix

 _Isn't it always? :P_

Roxas

 _Perhaps. I will meet you all at the checkout shortly._

Saix

 _There are a couple items that certainly push it as far as frugality goes, Seven, yet you raise an interesting point…I will have to look over Eleven's cart quite closely when we all gather at an available lane._

Xemnas

 _Snitch. :P_

Marluxia

 _Jerky for the dog to chew on. How appropriate. :P_

Larxene

* * *

 **Aces High**

 **Luxord**

Hello again, all! What good fortune that I found alfredo sauce on clearance! I will be sure to find that cheesy fettucine alfredo recipe I discovered recently and make good use of it at a later date. Will my stomach and thighs regret that decision? Absolutely! But, will my taste buds be in love? Without question!

I thought that, since grocery store shopping has proven to be such a grand expedition for all of us, today serves as a healthy fount of inspiration for my next excerpt that will perhaps go into the finished product. Who's to say?

 _Market day, such a joyous occasion for the castle servants to show off their stuff when it came to their bartering skills! Vendors all gathered within the village circle, hawking their wares and attempting to make their boisterous voices heard for leagues around. Fresh fish from the local fisheries! Generous hunks of beef from the butchers! Bakers with their trays, like always, of freshly baked loaves of rye and wheat and barley. Whoever of King Roland's servile retinue would attend on that grandiose day was sure to be overwhelmed by all the tempting delicacies surrounding them. Oh, to stay within budget was a most arduous task for these masters of frugality, for certain!_

 **Comments:**

 _How did you manage to get all that typed on a bloody gummiphone?_

Xaldin

 _Skilled fingers, good sir!_

Luxord

 _How do you keep getting worse?!_

Zexion

 _A rhetorical question I will not deign to give a proper response to! ^_^_

Luxord

 _Ehm…Wasn't the king's name Reginald before?_

Xion

 _Oh, yes, that's right, Xion, it was! I'll correct it as soon as we get back._

Luxord

 _Don't rush now. *wry smile emoji*_

Xion

 _That's all very nice that you were moved to prose, my man…But, we're waiting in the checkout for you! We've been waiting for five minutes._

Xigbar

 _Oh, dear! I will be sure to remedy that then._

Luxord

 _This post is probably dead, but I'm going to need Reginald to have a love interest to make out with soon. Chop, chop! *claps hands*_

Olette

* * *

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

All right, cool, awesome! So, we ditched a lot of our packages of pizza rolls before Marly would so kindly do it for us. And there were some cookies we figured we didn't need—we just liked the smells coming from the bakery, our bad! And OK, we got some healthier, more sensible stuff since we obviously have something to prove to Saix now. Eat like a kid, yeah, right! I'll just have to prove him wrong. However, we got corn tortilla shells and dry spaghetti, because hell yeah, my famous spaghetti tacos will never be denied to my best friends! See you all at checkout!

 **Comments:**

 _*facepalm*_

Saix

 _Oh what? You know you want to try one!_

Axel

… _No thank you. How revolting._

Saix

 _Don't knock it until you've tried it! They are so freaking amazing. When Axel doesn't burn anything, he's actually a halfway decent cook._

Xion

 _Thanks, Xi. :P_

Axel

 _It's true!_

Xion

 _All right, I'm definitely coming over to hang in the kitchen with you guys this week! Spaghetti tacos, yes! I love to put extra sour cream on mine._

Demyx

 _I feel quite nauseous…._

Saix

 _And guac, you can never forget the guac!_

Roxas

 _This post might have just singlehandedly destroyed my day._

Saix

* * *

 **A/N: I somehow reached very far back in my subconscious for an iCarly "spaghetti taco" reference, and yet...That's just a weird quirky thing you remember, because that sounds both really interesting and really disgusting at the same time! I also threw in a BatB reference to pay homage, b/c I'd just seen the live-action version a few days ago and uh...non, merci. I still love the original, of course!**

 **And I kinda cringed at myself when writing Luxord's overly flowery stylings again, so I know I must have done a good job. Next chapter, the *somewhat* epic finale of the grocery store silliness.**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: And coming up, wow, perhaps the longest blog post in this duology to date! I hope you find it as worthwhile reading it as I did writing it.**

* * *

 **Chapter 19**

 **Music is Life**

 **Demyx**

OK, wow, so I thought the actual shopping around was bad enough…Getting through the check-out was in- _sane_! So, there were seven carts amongst all of us, right? I just got a small cart, because I figured I'm the one who gets to eat a little bit of what everyone else makes later. So, I mainly bought snacks. Healthy snacks, Xemnas, relax! I might have snuck a bag or two of Goldfish crackers, but other than that, nothing too costly. Just some peanut butter here, packages of raisins there, that sort of thing.

So, anyway, we were all in the same lane at one point, jockeying for the position of head of the line (all sorts of pushing and shoving, as you do). Even though, get this, there were three more carts ahead of us! Marluxia warped right up to near the front, but Xemnas wasn't having it. He blocked him with one of his light sabers and told him to go the next lane over, which had a five-cart line, _easy_! Then, he looked over in his cart and was like, "Eleven, why do you have—if I'm counting correctly—eighteen distinct kinds of hair product and eight of body wash?" Marly said something dumb like, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful" or some cliché like that. That was when Zexion and Saix raided his cart and took several of those bottles back. You regular good guy crew should have seen him! I think his face turned purple! He was screaming about how it was necessary for him to have all those things. 'Course, Xemnas overruled him.

*Although I'm pretty sure that Marluxia went back right after we left the building to drop munny on some of the returned shampoo AND a few jars of face cream, but you didn't hear that from me.*

Then, Larxene just bolted from our lane before she could get busted with all the make-up she got (no wonder she and Marly are dating, they are soooo OBSESSED with that kind of stuff) and paid for that as well as her food. At least it wasn't like her boyfriend's, where _half_ of his cart was full of beauty stuff. I could tell she thought ahead. She was actually the first of us to get out of the store.

Xigbar, Xaldin, and Luxord were bickering over what to make sushi with still, but they got over that hurdle pretty quickly, not much drama there. I think they might have settled on crab? I dunno, I'll know when they cook dinner on Thursday, I guess. There was absolutely no drama with Zexion, Lexaeus, and Vexen either. Zexion must have gotten things sorted out with Marluxia, because jeez, I thought that back-and-forth in the store would never end!

Some customer ran back to get chili beans while Axel, Roxas, Xion, and I were pretty close to them in line. That sucked. They were gone at least five minutes, it was ridiculous! And then when they got back, they had the can of chili beans AND a couple cans of soup AND laundry detergent. Jeez, if you forgot that much, just go to the back of the line and leave your cart there while you get those things. Doesn't sound that hard to me.

Otherwise, yeah, I think we all made it out OK after that…Oh, but I guess we all managed to spend 4950 munny all together, so we were literally thisclose to being over budget. Actually, with what Marly got…We might have gone overbudget now. Uh-oh.

 **Comments:**

 _What a hypocrite! Insists we must stay in budget, somehow miraculously gets every item he wanted even when he didn't need it! I honestly tried, all. I apologize that we failed._

Zexion

 _Do not despair, Six. I took the liberty of making copies of individual receipts when we got back to the castle. Eleven will get a stern talking-to from me. Very stern._

Xemnas

 _Ugh, I didn't like the "no treating yourself" rule, but I can't lie and say that Xemnas didn't shop like a sane person. He led by example. And uh, that's as far as I go there, I don't want to risk sounding too nice!_

Demyx

 _Hmmmm…Good thing Xemnas was near the head of the line, that's all I'm going to say about that!_

Xion

 _Yeah, treats, who needs them? Heh-heh-heh…_

Roxas

 _The kitchen pantry says otherwise, hi-yo!_

Axel

 _You people will never understand the constant trial it is to be beautiful and get the right products to ensure that that stays a reality! No wonder so many of you look to have unsightly hygiene!_

Marluxia

 _There's hygiene, and then there's vanity. It appears as though you have crossed that line. Oh, to be the fly on the wall of your conversation with the Superior soon!_

Luxord

 _What conversat—? *looks up thread* I see. Well, I have a perfectly good explanation for all of this._

Marluxia

 _Uh, no, you don't!_

Demyx

 _No one is really all that interested._

Xigbar

 _You have no case. You're basically screwed!_

Xion

* * *

 **Ramblings from a Sith Lord**

 **Xemnas**

I should like to (mostly) commend all of you for doing a reasonably adequate job in shopping for sensible products as well as expending your best efforts in staying within our collective budget. However, I should not be surprised that, in certain cases, I was not heeded to…I still see suspicious amounts of junk food in the cabinets and freezer that I am not pleased about. I suppose this is what I get for expecting to control every single grocery item that goes into this castle. It is frustrating to only be one Superior and be outnumbered by thirteen others, but such is this painful existence. It is also a lonely one, as I anticipate no one else can relate on that note.

However, we still went overbudget. And why? Of course, without much detective work, I can surmise one particularly vain, arrogant, and thoroughly selfish Nobody was the cause. Much to my astonishment, it was not Eight who gave us grief this time but Eleven. Rest assured, he has received his punishment and will hereby be cleaning the castle toilets for the next two weeks. All sixteen of them. Perhaps this will serve as a lesson in humility for him as well as, by his example, the rest of us.

 **Comments:**

 _Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha!_

Roxas

 _Man, you guys don't hold back on cruel punishments over there, do you?_

Riku

 _No, Riku, and that's why most of us try to keep out of Xem's way. Because, otherwise, we can get stuck with the WORST chores!_

Xion

 _I have the last laugh in more ways than one, it would seem. This book was well worth the purchase, as I thought._

Zexion

 _Hey, come on, Xemnas, I'm usually a good boy now most of the time! Not that I aim to please you, of course, that's never been what I'm about. I'm just not dumb._

Axel

 _As you say, Eight._

Xemnas

 _Great…Two-week moratorium on dates._

Larxene

 _None of this was my fault, Larxene! Surely, you would not let the Superior prevent us from seeing each other._

Marluxia

 _It's not that. I'm just not getting near those nasty bathroom smells. You can have those yourself! :P_

Larxene

 _True love never dies. :P_

Marluxia

 _This is the most fun I've had on a post in a while!_

Sora

* * *

 **A/N: Maybe rather unsurprisingly, Marluxia is a character I can imagine being fairly religious about his beauty products/rituals to the point where he'll try just about anything to make sure he gets where he wants as far as that goes. Of course, he's punished for his efforts, but beauty's pain and all that, right? :P**

 **I'm hoping not to take so long next time, but I'll just be happy if I get this out next Tuesday at the latest. That way, I don't keep all of you hanging. And hopefully, I won't get sick again any time soon!**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Hey, all! Well, I will say I'm getting somewhat better about updating this. I realize it's better to go at my own pace, though, and not try to rush these out too much. I wouldn't do this for any other story but this one, since the format makes these chapters relatively short. And besides, I feel I'm more than halfway done. I'll admit to not having a set chapter limit, but I'm thinking about as long as the previous story, about 30-35 chapters or so. I will say, I think I'll be getting close to finishing in the next few weeks or so!**

 **Oh, and btw, if you haven't checked out a little fic called Your Adventure Begins at Midday, you, like, totally should. That's where I've been the past few days. ;)**

* * *

 **Chapter 20**

 **You Know**

 **Rai**

Yo, guys, and here I thought keeping my brother away from the Disciplinary Committee was tough! I guess that's nothing compared to grocery shopping with you Organization dudes. Looks like all posts about that are the top-viewed this week, big surprise. You know, maybe I ought to get my little bro back online, after all. I kinda liked being popular on here even if, you know, that wasn't me. Any publicity is good, right?

Oh, and Seifer wants me to tell you all that there's going to be another Struggle tournament soon. And that he's going to come back and win everything!

 **Comments:**

 _Is that right? Jeez, Roxas, it'd be a great time to come back to Twilight Town and prove Seifer wrong! :)_

Olette

 _Hmmmm, maybe. :)_

Roxas

 _I would totally pay to see him lose again. This time, maybe I can get a round in!_

Hayner

 _Pfft, I could beat all of you chickenwusses in my sleep!_

Seifer

 _Dude, Vivi took you out last time. How soon we forget, huh? :P_

Pence

 _Look, we don't talk about that. And that literally wasn't Vivi, OK? Thought we'd established that._

Seifer

 _Struggle, huh? Sora told me about it once…Maybe I could participate. :P_

Kairi

 _Ha, you, though?! Yeah right, haven't you heard? No girls allowed! 'Sides, you wouldn't even last the first round anyway. You'd cry about breaking a nail and run all the way home. But all prissy-like, like you girls do!_

Rai

 _Dude. I'm female. Or have you…Conveniently forgotten?_

Fuu

 _You're…You're different, Fuu. You can hang._

Rai

 _Uh-huh. :P_

Fuu

 _OK, number one, I've broken many a nail while in the gym, so I don't even bat an eye at that any more. And number two, who's to say I can't kick your butt? One might not be able to tell, but I've actually developed quite a bit of muscle over time._

Kairi

 _Yeah, you tell him, Kai!_

Riku

 _I will. Genuinely pay. To see it. Seifer's ego. Is too much. Sometimes._

Fuu

 _We still typing like that, huh? -_-_

Olette

 _But, you got a great point! I too will bring the popcorn and see what Kairi can do to the guys. :D_

Olette

… _Fine, if you gotta insist on breaking glass ceilings or whatever. Sign-up's on Tuesday. Be there or be chicken. :P_

Seifer

 _Who's to say I won't break one…on YOUR FACE!_

Kairi

 _I just can't believe how much I love you sometimes. *heart emoji* I'll come with to cheer you on when the time comes._

Sora

 _Thanks, honeybun!_

Kairi

 _Go, Kairi, go!_

Selphie

 _Hey, if Kairi wants to take Seifer on, I'll sit this out and watch her do it instead of me. You're going to be great out there, Kai!_

Roxas

* * *

 **Warrior Princess**

 **Kairi**

Uh, wow, that escalated quickly. I think I just agreed to sign up for a tournament that involves me beating the candy out of taller, bigger guys with rubber bats. Without a helmet. Well, either my training is going to come in handy or I'm going to be left with a lot of egg on my face. I don't do this kind of thing every day…Then again, this could be great motivation for me to train harder AND prove I'm more than capable on my own without having to worry about some random scooping me up to kidnap me every five minutes. :P

 **Comments:**

 _For your sake, I hope that won't happen at the tournament. Because I could honestly see someone trying to pull that. -_-_

Namine

 _Well, good thing the Struggle is going to be off-script and off-set, because otherwise, something like that would totally happen in any one of our scripts, let's be real._

Kairi

 _But…But your contract! Wouldn't that violate some specific part of it?_

Demyx

 _Hm, don't think so. It doesn't extend to my off-screen hobbies. If it did, I probably wouldn't be allowed to work out either. And when I don't go to the gym, I jog every single morning. So, they can't stop me from doing those things. ;)_

Kairi

 _You might be smaller than them, but that just means you can maneuver around them that much more easily. Irvy and I will totally be rooting for you!_

Selphie

 _Thanks, Selph! I know you have my back. :)_

Kairi

 _If you can knock me off my feet, I'm sure you can do it to some of these other guys. I got the feeling some of them are all talk and no follow-through!_

Axel

 _I'm placing bets right now. The current odds of you winning are 1 in 100. Just so you know. :P_

Seifer

 _Why do I get the feeling you're gloating too early? *thinking face emoji*_

Kairi

* * *

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** *signs in* Hey, guys, it's been a while! What's up?

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Funny you should ask that…because Xion and I have been talking about some…weird developments we think have been happening lately.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Yeah, something fishy is going on around these parts, but it could be just us.

 **Exorcised16** : *signs in* Yeah? What's your hunch?

 **AntiAnybody14:** Ehm…You ever get the vibe that Saix and Lea are totally crushing on each other?

 **Exorcised16:** WHAT?!

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** Ah, too funny, Xi! Lea would never…Um, would he?

 **UWILLHATEMYCAPS:** We're not so sure.

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** Ooh, a potential romance on the horizon! Leave it to me, I can set it up.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Selph, that might not be the wisest course of action, considering your heavy involvement in the yaoi thing. And besides, Lea is one of my best friends. I'd rather you didn't fetishize his preferences. :P

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** Oh what? Think I wouldn't learn my lesson after my last laptop got destroyed? Lol. Believe me, I know a good match when I see—or hear about—one.

 **Exorcised16:** Idk about you guys, but isn't it kind of early to speculate who Lea likes or what team he plays for or whatever? I mean, has he…?

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS** : Come out? Hmmmmm, not really, not to us. And he does *surprise* relationships, usually. Like, no one ever sees them coming. Ever.

 **Crayola=Love15:** *signs in* As someone who dated him, I can confirm this. Also, I may have picked up on some…vibes. *sly smile emoji*

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** Ooh! Like?

 **Crayola=Love15:** I mean, there's no doubt we were genuinely into each other. :) It doesn't negate that…but I think there's a lot of unresolved stuff between him and Saix that needs ironing out, that's all. If anything more comes of it, it's up to them. I feel sort of gross for talking behind his back like this. :/

 **AntiAnybody14:** Yeah, maybe we are getting too deep with this…We just don't want him getting hurt.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** But, say, if this does end up becoming a thing and a good thing at that…How do we nudge them into going out?

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** Seriously, guys, this stuff is my expertise! I could tell you!

 **Exorcised16:** Eh….Not with your checkered past.

 **AntiAnybody14:** I'll be taking a rain check on that.

 **Crayola=Love15:** I don't see how that'd be for the better…

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** Oh, come on! How do you think Xion and Riku got together? It was my plan all along! :D

 **Exorcised16:** Only because I figured I ought to establish something so you could quit the weird flirting you were doing, lol! 'Sides, the attraction between me and Xi was pretty instantaneous. It was going to happen whether you intervened or not.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Indeed. ;)

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** *sigh* Well, I clearly can't do anything…How about this? Have Axel and Saix been hanging out more often lately?

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS** : Now that you mention it, they have. They're gym buddies sometimes now at the castle. They've had ice cream on the clock tower a couple times, apparently, but Axe brushes that off like it's no big deal. But, texting? Oh, yeah, that's gone up by, like, a lot!

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** Would you also say that something's there that wasn't there before? :D

 **AntiAnybody14:** Ugh, cringe, Sora! You've obviously spent too much time at Beast's Castle lately! :P

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** I've paid a couple visits, so? And he's not the Beast any more btw.

 **GingerSpiceFlower:** *signs in* You saying my sparring partner's got a boyfriend in mind? Hmmm…I may have to drop hints and get him to seek something out. I think there's potential. ;)

 **Exorcised16:** Uh, this stuff's totally beyond me. I didn't even know there was anything, although I guess Saix's been nicer on Lea's posts lately. In fact, I don't think they insult each other on random people's blogs any more like they used to.

 **AntiAnybody14:** Well, we're all clearly very interested in where this goes! Just, everyone, let's not spell things out for either of them. Capiche?

 **Crayola=Love15:** No problem! I'm pretty quiet most of the time anyway, so no one's going to think I know anything.

 **UWILLH8MYCAPS:** Sora, this goes for you, too. I know you have a big mouth. :P You can't tell anyone not in this chatroom!

 **AllThatandaRingofKeys:** Keyblade warrior's honor!

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** I've left my fic phase behind me, so I definitely won't try anything! 'Sides, Kai's in a better position to set them up than me. I'll just let her do it! ^_^

 **GingerSpiceFlower:** Or how about we let them be real adults, figure this out themselves, and then try to make something of this? :P Besides, I can only nudge so much, now that I think about it!

 **GurlyGurlGurl:** Hmmmmm….That works, too! Less fun, but it works. :P

 **GingerSpiceFlower:** I'll bring my Cupid's arrows if you want me to be less subtle, ha!

 **AntiAnybody14:** Hope for the best, prepare for the worst, that's all we can do!

*All users sign out*

* * *

 **A/N: Yes, I may just be teasing out a particular yaoi ship. :) An FYI, yes, I do write yaoi on occasion-it's a guarantee from me, though, that I don't do it for its own sake but, rather, to explore the more emotional components of the relationship, too. Just like I do with a het ship. Because I think those who are fans deserve as much. Besides, this was just something I've been contemplating all the way back to Ch. 6 or so, so I'm not pulling this out of thin air, if anyone's wondering! XD**

 **As for Kairi, I'm trying to make sure she's not all talk and no action in this fic...unlike in KH3 *ahem-hem*! And anyway, I've kinda wondered why girls didn't compete in Struggles in KH2. Answer is prob. obvious, but this is my random fic, I'll do what I want! XP**

 **And on to the next chapter!**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Bit of a hodgepodge here, but this was honestly to make for shorter reading compared to the previous chapter. B/c yes, that may have been the longest "chat" I've written for these stories too. But oh well, no big. Here's 21!**

* * *

 **Chapter 21**

 **Everyman Keyman**

 **Sora**

Well, Kairi and I are on countdown to Struggle Day! She signed up today and ignored all the weird looks she was getting from everybody. I know they're just underestimating her before they even see her fight. They don't know what she can do yet! She's been upping the ante on her training, sparring with Riku and me way more often than she used to. We used to be one-on-one while she was on the sidelines, but having two-on-one matches can be pretty fun, too! Riku trounces us sometimes, but I'd say we're both catching up to his level. We've been toting around our Keyblades for a while now, so it's obvious we've gotten stronger.

I've had a couple people here message me, asking me how I feel about my girlfriend potentially being tougher than me. And to that, I say, well, she was always tough! It was just all mental/emotional before, but now, she's almost on my level…And I'm proud of her for that! I don't care if anyone thinks I'm a wimp or less of a guy for that. Why shouldn't I be happy for my awesome girlfriend? I think people are just getting jealous.

 **Comments:**

 _Aw, thanks for vouching for me, babe! And were those guys giving me dirty looks? Huh, I wasn't paying attention. :D I can agree with you that I've come a long way. And just another FYI to everyone: unlike this upcoming script, when I actually say I'm going to fight, well, I'm going to do it. ;)_

Kairi

 _Good luck next week! Pence and I watch the Struggle anyway for Hayner, but we're definitely going to pull for you, too!_

Olette

 _Thanks, Lette!_

Kairi

 _It'll be great to compete with you!_

Hayner

 _That's really sweet of you, Hayner. I think you're the first Struggle guy who's said that to me, heh. The rest of them are so clearly insecure!_

Kairi

 _Kick butt. Rai and Seifer are. Incredibly dumb. I can say that. Because they're friends. But, they've been. Complete asshats about this. For real. :P_

Fuu

 _Ugh, Fuu, come on, you can't be still mad about this!_

Seifer

 _Yeah, and why call us dumb anyway?_

Rai

 _I call it. As I see it. I'm not mad. Just irritated. :P_

Fuu

 _Looks like Xi, Roxas, and I got a trip to Twilight Town in the near future! Good luck, sparring buddy!_

Axel

 _I have a feeling you're going to do well. And Sora's right. Everyone's probably jealous of you two because you're so supportive of each other. :)_

Riku

 _I mean, that's what I figure, lol._

Sora

* * *

 **Years of Flowers**

 **Marluxia**

I'll have people know that my first week of cleaning duty is over with, thank goodness! It has been excruciating, but I've made sure to have a hairnet on when I do this unpleasant activity to keep my hair perfectly coiffed. Speaking of which, all this because I want to maintain basic hair care. How ludicrous. I hope all of you are more than satisfied with your various food and drink luxuries that you wasted munny on.

 **Comments:**

 _Hey, man, neither should you blow half of YOUR munny on all that shampoo either. Don't you like to eat?_

Xigbar

 _I do, but the vast majority of my food is what I take from my garden where no one…Ugh, why repeat myself at this point? I feel like a broken record. *glare*_

Marluxia

 _The castle bathrooms aren't as much of pig sties as I thought, because you still smell as fresh as a rose bush,_ mon amour!

Larxene

 _I can't believe you doubted me for even a second. :P Of course I wasn't going to let this disgusting work degrade me more than it already has._

Marluxia

 _Funny, because I really don't feel sorry for you. Hate to break it to you, Flower Boy, but this is what people with actual chores to do put up with every day! Wild, isn't it?_

Axel

 _I still can't believe Xemnas went as hard on you as he did, Marly. Maybe you just get better hair products than him, lol!_

Demyx

 _Gloat more, why don't you, you simpletons!_

Marluxia

* * *

 **Hell (Still) Hath Fury**

 **Axel/Lea**

I've been continuing my workouts at the castle gym, but not gonna lie, I like the Destiny Islands gym a bit more. At least I get an actual view outside while I'm on the treadmill. It's too dark here at TWTNW, but I guess we're supposed to be "dark" too, no brainer. I've gotten some good company at both places, though, so that's always a good thing. Though Kairi's been kind of weird lately. She's been asking me if I got anyone new in my life, because according to her, I got this glow going on. Pretty sure it's just because I'm a pyro, but she doesn't seem to believe me when I tell her that. And she's giving me all this advice about how I ought to put myself out there.

Thing is, I'm not looking for anybody right now. Well, if I was, I'm not going to be posting about it! If I was…Trying to get someone to like me…Or something lame like that. Heh, funny...Why would I put myself through the humiliation?

Seriously, Kai, what is actually up?

 **Comments:**

 _Perhaps she only has your best interests at heart and is trying to coax you into a relationship with someone that might be beneficial. Otherwise, I have no inkling as to what she would be talking about._

Saix

 _Yeah, man, I don't know either!_

Axel

 _What's up, you say? Hm, that's for me to know and you to find out!_

Kairi

 _Aw, come on, you can't leave me hanging like that! :P_

Axel

 _Not for me to set you up with anybody, ultimately. Only you can do that…_

Kairi

 _Can anybody translate what she's saying to me? Because I don't get it._

Axel

 _*sigh* You always did have a thick skull._

Namine

 _I think you'll figure it out on your own. Eventually. :P_

Roxas

 _Hmph, you all obviously know something I don't…_

Axel

 _One could say you might be the last to know?_

Saix

 _Uh, what? OK, time to hit the gym! Staying on the computer isn't going to help anything, I can see that. :P_

Axel

 _Nope! You know how weirdly vague people can be when you least want them to be._

Xion

 _Tell me about it…_

Axel

* * *

 **A/N: I'll say this: I'm intentionally walking a fine line with Axel here, in terms of how much he really knows what's up and why he's also in some denial. I'll do my best to dig into that a bit more as I'm eventually winding this fic down. It's definitely something I'm thinking about, for sure.**

 **It's a curious thing, what exactly Fuu brings to the table with Seifer and Rai, at least it kinda is for me. I think she's the calm one of the group who calls the guys out on their BS when the occasion calls for it, like here! And, 'sides, thought I'd bring her back to this fic considering she's been largely absent. I'm glad I squeezed her in where I did.**

 **As always, guys, thanks for your views/reviews/follows! I was stunned at how many hits I got to my profile and stories last week. One-day stories stats especially, holy crap! That was almost a personal record. Thanks for all that support, everyone! Feels pretty good, especially since I had strayed from fic for a while there.**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Wow, guys, I am really sorry for the delay! Well, not super sorry, as I wouldn't have wanted to rush too much and give you chapters I'd think were subpar but anyway. Short version is: I got sick again (may have been The Flu Round 2 for all I know), got into a creative block, got exhausting work days, and was distracted by a combination of new and returning TV shows coming on (especially Killing Eve XD), a puzzle book I've been working through, and replaying KH1 for "inspiration" among other things. Heh. But, the block's been the hardest to get through. Hopefully, you enjoy these chapters after the wait!**

* * *

 **Chapter 22**

 **Mastering Illusions, Telling People off 24/7**

 **Zexion**

Have you all been curious about what I've been up to lately? If I could feel much giddiness, it would be the emotion I can most identify with right now. I have dabbled in various illusions and tricks from the Dark Arts, but I am now moving on to potions! Yes, no longer am I content to be a mere illusionist, I want to cross over into sorcery. I have pilfered some herbs here and there from the greenhouse for these mystical recipes. I am currently trying to concoct one that will yield immunity to the common cold—well, temporarily. I already anticipate that some of you will be requesting love potions from me, but please, refrain from that nonsense. Love spells are so trite, so passé, definitely not to my taste as someone who aims to call himself a well-rounded sorcerer.

Now, if only Vexen and his time machine would stop making so much bloody racket so I could get more accomplished!

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, now people use my greenhouse. And for what? Magic? Ugh._

Marluxia

 _Let's face it, Marluxia. Only my powers are the closest to wizardry out of the whole Organization. They are simply beyond your understanding, you being the green thumb and everything. :P_

Zexion

 _How many times do I have to remind you all that I also rule death? D-E-A-T-H, put that in your pipe and smoke it!_

Marluxia

 _I don't smoke, sorry. :P_

Zexion

 _If there's an energy potion, so I could actually accomplish all that I want to in a day…Now, that, I would take advantage of. :)_

Lexaeus

 _Just open up a can of Monster, Lexaeus. Though, of course, perhaps not…Those drinks are quite putrid, much like drinking unfiltered gasoline. *thinking face emoji*_

Zexion

 _Well, I certainly apologize for all the noise, Zexion! It's not my intention, but I have run into a bit of a kerfuffle with the time machine._

Vexen

 _Oh?_

Zexion

 _Yes, I…I may have brought back people instead of objects by mistake._

Vexen

 _Oh. -_- Vexen, you dunce._

Zexion

 _I can assure you, this was completely on accident!_

Vexen

 _I am sure our Superior will be very interested to hear about all the goings-on. Perhaps a general update post is in order._

Zexion

* * *

 **Blinded Me with Science**

 **Vexen**

Very well. If Zexion so insists on an explanation for this ruckus downstairs, I suppose I am obligated to give one to everyone. So, here it is. I meant to travel to the past, pre-Keyblade War era, to retrieve a valuable item. A holy grail, I suppose…It's actually a very valuable mythril goblet that was used by either Master Xehanort or Master Eraqus during their epic match we now refer to as the Chess Game of Foreshadowing of Year 1175 of the Second Keyblade Age Anno Domini. Do not ask me to put all that into an acronym, it is impossible! As much as I wish I could…Anyway, I did not go back far enough, and these three individuals then fell in with me at the Keyblade Graveyard (around Year 12 of the Third Keyblade Age Anno Domini). And now, my time machine needs fixed! And it's all their fault! Hopefully, they do not learn how to use our modern Keyblade Age technology, or I will be in for a world of hurt, for certain. They're already displeased enough with me as it is!

 **Comments:**

 _No comments_

*15 minutes later*

 _Seriously, people?! This is a major historic (albeit accidental) find! It's disrupting the castle as I speak! How is nobody commenting? Oh forget it…_

Vexen

* * *

 **Subject: Testing 1, 2, 3**

Am I online? I'm not used to typing yet, but I think I'll get the hang of it. Uh, hey, guys. Terra here. I know it's probably weird for you Organization people, to have us in your castle right now, but believe me, we're not intending on staying! Your resident mad scientist is yelling about how we ruined his time machine, but hey, we'd never seen one like it before. We didn't know quite what to do, and we figured it was a weapon meant to destroy us, like something Xehanort made. So, Aqua, Ven, and I went at it with our Keyblades just as we were getting into this present time. So, uh, yeah, heh, we might have done some damage to it. My question is, though, wouldn't you if you thought it was a deadly machine meant to zap you from existence?

Things were pretty rough in the past anyway. Maybe it's kind of a blessing in disguise that we're here now. So, we might as well make the best of it and live our lives out here, you know? Is it cool if we hang out on the website too?

By the way, thanks to Xion, Roxas, and Lea for letting us use Roxas' computer and keeping us away from some of the weirdos here. We won't be intruding on your, eh, hospitality too long, we promise!

 **Posted by: Terra**

 **Comments:**

 _Hey, who're you calling weirdos? Also, aren't you the guy who "zapped" my_ eye _out of existence?_

Xigbar

 _We won't be staying long, we swear!_

Terra

 _Didn't answer my question, bud._

Xigbar

 _Knowing Terra, if he took out your eye, you probably deserved it!_

Aqua

 _Hey, lady, can you not butt in? The dudes are talking. :P_

Xigbar

 _As usual, we're proving to be within a hostile environment where we can't be nice to visitors! Sorry, guys, Xig is kinda the resident snoop/guard dog in much the same way Vexen is the resident mad scientist. Speaking for me, Lea, and Rox, we're very happy to have met you! And thanks for the post, Terra. You're more than welcome to hang out on our site. Consider yourselves honorary bloggers! :D_

Xion

 _No problem, Xion! It's been a relief to meet a few sane people here, at least._

Terra

 _Ahem! I would like to consider myself sane. I leave people well enough alone, even if I do read fantasy novels and engage in novice sorcery._

Zexion

 _Magic, huh? You can talk to Aqua about that. ;)_

Terra

 _How about no. -_-_

Aqua

 _And I just want to say it's been great seeing you again, Lea!_

Ven

 _Wait, again? Yeah, we need to straighten out the whole clone situation too, don't we? Like, why am I a literal copy of a guy who was living ten years ago? What's with this?_

Roxas

 _I don't know, but I think it's cool to have a clone!_

Ven

 _Eh…..Nah._

Roxas

 _Sorry, Rox, buddy. I do have a lot of explaining to do, don't I? Heh._

Axel

 _And why does Isa have a big scar on his face?_

Ven

 _*facepalm* Let's not get into this nonsense right now…_

Saix

 _We're hoping to leave soon. Does our old castle still exist? It would be at a place called Land of Departure. It's got these turrets that are spread out—they're the most distinctive features._

Aqua

 _Oh no. You three aren't going ANYWHERE until you help me fix my time machine!_

Vexen

 _Ignore the raving science guy. He's just mad that he can't mess around with Edison for a while like he wants to. :P Or raid the pyramids._

Xion

 _I think Sora and I can help take you guys back, since we're Keyblade wielders, too._

Riku

 _Yep, sure can! 'Sides, I think I might know where that place is at. Maybe._

Sora

 _And I would come with, but I'm training really hard for this Struggle tournament._

Kairi

 _Oh, cool! Thanks, guys!_

Aqua

 _And all of this has gone on under my nose…Number Four, I will need to speak with you in my office soon._

Xemnas

 _Oh, phooey! Can this day get any worse?!_

Vexen

 _Yeah. Actually. I may or may not have short-circuited your time machine before you took off today. Just for funsies. :P_

Larxene

 _UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!_

Vexen

* * *

 **A/N: Bit of an explanation here, briefly. I originally wasn't going to put the Wayfinder Trio in my story, since I wasn't sure if there was a way I could include them in my story without looking like I was forcing them in. However, with this whole time machine business with Vexen in this fic, I decided that that was how they'd come to be in the same time/place as every other character here. I was going to have something "go wrong" with the time machine anyway and have there be shenanigans, so where better in the story to put this trio in than here? Why not? It might mean the fic could possibly go on a bit longer than I'd intended, but that's OK!**

 **As for the Keyblade Ages and years, yeah, I'll admit, I made them completely up! I wanted to do a sort of LOTR kind of age labeling deal as far as that went. If there's a technical way of denoting years in KH, I can't say I'd know off-hand. And I just also found it kind of amusing that, in KH3, a chess game that Eraqus and Xehanort played as kids somehow foreshadowed so many events. :P**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: In which I give the Wayfinder Trio their own blogs. I'll say right off the bat, I promise that Ven's blog will be in the next chapter! I'm not sure how often these kinds of posts will be in the story, but I'm making sure there are "posts" from them at least once.**

* * *

 **Chapter 23**

 **Magic. Myth. Mystery.**

 **Aqua**

I hope this works as a blog title, especially considering my friends and I got a crash course on modern Internet over the weekend (was not expecting that). Anyway, thanks to Sora and Riku, we're all back home where we belong. We had to work a little Keyblade magic to restore the castle to what it once was. Riku told us that it had been Castle Oblivion in the years we weren't there, which seemed to really surprise Sora. I guess he sort of remembers it but in a kind of haze. We were surprised too, when Riku also said that I guess the Organization (you know, the ones whose residence we were at) were the ones to take our home and turn it into a second headquarters.

Well, that's awkward.

But, on the bright side, I'm finally back home with my little family of friends and practicing my magic spells just like I used to! Terra's trying to drop hints that this Zexion guy and I might have something in common as far as that goes. Which, Terra, no. Just no. I'm not interested in matchmaking right now…unless, of course, it involves lighting matches with fire spells!

 **Comments:**

 _What?! We don't have Castle Oblivion anymore? That was a prime piece of real estate, and you three have just now decided to conveniently come back and usurp it from us. Unbloodyforgiveable!_

Xaldin

 _Hey, calm down, Mutton Chops. We didn't think our castle needed restoring, we were just going off of what Riku told us. :P_

Aqua

 _And it's not usurping, if it's our home! If anything, you guys were the squatters._

Ven

 _Squatters?! Be right back, guys, I'm knocking some kids' heads in!_

Xigbar

 _What Xigbar means to say is that he's very happy that you have found your home and flipped it back to where it was. :P_

Luxord

 _I am SO not cool with this, du_

Xigbar

 _We have taken him away from his laptop. I do believe he may be starting to foam at the mouth in anger. We will, of course, apologize on his behalf. He has been more prone to losing his temper ever since you all appeared in our time._

Saix

 _Hm, wonder why._

Aqua

 _Most likely because of his shared history with Terra. It must have been a very contentious one._

Saix

 _Speaking of Terra…Are you implying here that he is trying to set up you and me? Huh. Now that I recall, I do remember seeing you in Radiant Garden once, when I was a child. Um…You were my first crush. 0/0 I cannot tell you how odd it is to see you the same age while I am older than you in this current timeline. Um. I have a book to read._

Zexion

 _What? You were that little apprentice kid?! Oh, that's…That's weird. Terra, come on!_

Aqua

 _Uh, hey, I didn't know! I thought, you know, the magic thing, you guys could have conversations about that…_

Terra

 _I'm NOT dating someone who was a kid the last time I saw him! Gross!_

Aqua

 _Nobody said anything about dating. Didn't you always say you wanted to find someone you had magic abilities in common with?_

Terra

 _To train alongside, not date! What is it with you guys' obsession with who's going out with who? Is it because we didn't really have a typical high school education? *eyeroll*_

Aqua

 _We…have a lot of talking to do, don't we?_

Terra

 _Later, maybe. :p I'll be off reading some of these old spellbooks now._

Aqua

 _Oooh, you made her mad, Ter!_

Ven

 _Heh. Serves me right for trying to play matchmaker, huh?_

Terra

 _This whole thread…Wow, guys, welcome to the site! This is crazy already._

Riku

 _You're not kidding. Is it like this on here every day?_

Ven

 _You would not believe._

Sora

* * *

 **I Am a Rock**

 **Terra**

I was struggling to come up with a decent title, and besides, it's a pretty good song! So…I do feel like I messed up with Aqua a few days ago. I didn't mean to, of course I didn't. And it's not like any of us need to find dates right away, we're still trying to get used to this timeline! But, it hasn't been that bad so far. We got good online friends who give us plenty of support. Sora and Riku have been coming by once in a while to check in on us and probably making sure we're not too out-there online. It's weird that this place has wifi now, it never used to. And then we just recently bought ourselves gummiphones besides, now those are really weird!

I don't know what got into me in wanting to set Aqua up with someone right away. I guess it's because all we've been doing is fighting bad guys for a couple years now that we could all use a bit of a break. And what's better downtime than spending time with someone you can connect with? Someone you can just be yourself around and not have to worry about judging too much. Someone you can laugh with…cry with…All that. On that note, maybe I should set myself up with someone, heh. I forgot just how lonely it's been, dealing with darkness and everything.

 **Comments:**

 _Oh, you like Aqua, my friend, that much is obvious!_

Xion

 _What? I mean, no, not like that. She's kinda like a sister to me…I think. Or she probably sees me as kind of an older brother, at least._

Terra

 _How much did you have to stretch yourself to reach for that comeback? ;)_

Axel

 _You're right, that wasn't very convincing! *sheepish grin emoji* I would not stand a chance._

Terra

 _Really? We've only known each other five years. :P We need to move that talk up to NOW, I think. :)_

Aqua

 _So much for sibling-type relationships. :P_

Roxas

 _Yeah, everyone's getting paired up now! Hey, Rox, when do you think Lea is going to—?_

Ven

 _All in good time, man, all in good time!_

Roxas

 _What about Lea, huh? Man, this dancing around the topic of me is getting old, too. :P_

Axel

 _Hm, can't say I'm surprised. Can't win them all. That's all well and good, I'm anti-social anyway. The only love I need is the Dark Arts. :P_

Zexion

 _That…was not creepy at all._

Axel

* * *

 **Ramblings of a Sith Lord**

 **Xemnas**

I must say it is a most surprising development that these Wayfinders should somehow make their way into our present. A surprising development yet a most unwelcome one. How would one be able to explain why this Terra fellow and I look so much alike? I well know the reason, but it was one I never wanted to delve into, particularly with my colleagues. I have made it known to Vexen that I am most displeased with him that he brought this about, even in his own incompetent way. He can take as long as he needs in fixing that accursed time machine of his, I certainly am in no rush for it to be in one piece again. This is what he gets for meddling with the rules and ramifications of the space-time continuum.

Also, I really do not want to trouble myself with Keyblade skirmishes. It had been such a good life, not having to worry over this war business.

 **Comments:**

 _We won't bother you as long as you don't bother us. Sound fair?_

Terra

 _Don't you care even a little that we look so similar?_

Xemnas

 _Hardly. Not when Roxas and Ven are identical, Xion and Sora have the same eyes and much of the same face, and every other girl I've seen/met on the site seems to have the same nose!_

Terra

 _Omg, we do have, like, the same nose, don't we?!_

Selphie

 _Yeah, so? There's only a limited amount of nose shapes in the world. :P_

Olette

 _Hm. Well, be that as it may, as long as you three exist, you are still threats to me._

Xemnas

 _But, we're not. And we don't plan on being threats, unless you somehow disrupt our peacekeeping. All we want is rest and relaxation after what Xehanort put us through—put EVERYONE through. Isn't that enough?_

Aqua

 _Very well. But, my paranoia will remain for quite some time._

Xemnas

 _Good tbh. :P_

Kairi

* * *

 **A/N: I'll admit, these chapters but this one especially was improv'd, more than usual. I'm kinda ashamed about it, but at the same time, eh, maybe I'm being too hard on myself. I just could not help but keep my shipping tendencies at bay! And I also thought it'd be kind of funny to see Zexion be capable of being flustered for once, even if that failed instance of "matchmaking" was kind of weird. There was also (well, as far as the game's attempts go anyway, which are barely there as to be almost non-existent) an implication, I thought, of Terra and Aqua kinda catching feelings for each other in 3. But, that could have just been me projecting. :P So, I thought I'd explore that a little, that's all!**

 **And the nose thing was a bit of a joke, considering it was a running joke that I saw of the CG animated Disney princesses having pretty much the same face. The KH girls probably do not have the same nose, and I never paid much attention anyway.**

 **Well, until next time, everyone!**


End file.
